Life through the year
Entry posted by soda ·
446 views
on 29.12.09 I went NZ embassy hand my visitor visa application but I be told that they closed since 25.12.09 till 04.01.10. I think I’d come back later and I need to update book bank if apply after today. It was our last day of work in 2009. everyone in the office got paid, except me I was not happy about that and my boss is angry too when he heard that. in the evening I sat alone grumpy at home and eating dry durian that Ms. Perfect given to me couple days ago.
30.12.09 I bought ¼ of 1 kg dry durian more to eat coz I’m not happy and don’t want to go anywhere even friends call to meet, I said no because I’m not in a good mood. stay home all day and out to buy food nearby and back home, eat, strumming guitar, reading book and grumpy..etc..
31.12.09 woke up I felt my body pain, sore throat as if I have high fever (dry durian kill me)…but still went to Chachengchrao. It was horrible coz I felt asleep most of time, sore throat & ill. In the evening I don’t want to go out anywhere so I lay in bed and purring like a cat while hearing ppl yelling, shouting, counting down from 9 to 0 and then clap hands …..
01.01.10 woke up late and still tired so I look for something to eat then head to massage.
02.01.10 at home and talk to friends most of day by phone.
03.01.10 went to see movie with cousin at the emporium (Sherlock Holms) and when we back she was with me until late in the evening. Then I went to Dental Clinic nearby to clean my teeth I meet the dentist once a year. I am the 5 person who in line waiting for the dentist and kill the time by read newspaper about detox by coffee’s article and it was interested. I think I should try to do this myself asap.
It took 1 hour waited to my turn and before the dentist cleaning my teethe I have a question:
Me: Dr. Can you look? I feel like I have more teeth than last year.
Dentist: Yes, you have wisdom teeth..
Me: Dr. you already pulled out one already last year.
Dentist: Yes, but that one was in your lower jaw but these are in your upper jaws left & right (2 teeth)
Me: Damn!!! All this years I’ve enjoying my teeth pulling out a lot.
Dentist: if you want to pull today let me know I’ll do it after cleaning or you come back later.
Me: Ok, I’ll do it.
Dentist: Which side?
Me: Both.
Dentist: No!!! you need one side for eating and after a week or two if you fully recover from pain then you come back to get another side pull out.
Me: Ok, Dr. Then take the right tooth off.
You wouldn’t believe me that half of my skull still hurt now because I eat as if my tooth never pull out at all that cause me painfully sore and take paracetamols everyday. Somehow I think the pain is a sort of my pleasure.
04.01.10 at home there was a called telling the booking flight is invalid because no confirmation, she said that she will rebook me again but not confirm the seat would be available.
11 AM I calling my cousin to google for me where they sell detox set. Then I went to Silom to buy and at first I thought it would cost me at least one thousand baht but actually it not over 300 baht so I back with happy.
05.01.10 at work and was grumpy and depressed all day since knowing that I wouldn’t get paid. At 11 AM the big boss (co owner) came to me said he was sorry to hear that I didn’t get my salary while all ppl here had paid since 29.12.09 he said he ordered them to settle immediately before he left the office. I was happy after be told but it turns out of event when a payroll person came to me said “You can’t get paid by todayâ€. I was in terror and can't imagine when it will be if it not today.
Late at night I was cried like hell. I have to apply for visa coz i need to confirm the ticket asap and my book bank needed update. Thinking of last year someone try to get me out of job by report me to head office in Swiss but it didn’t success because my boss is well protected me (don’t want to get in details coz it long story). I lay still, gone mad with thought “ maybe this is a signal as something don’t mean to be… if they reject my visa’s application or I have no seat to fly then maybe this is my destinyâ€. I was non stop crying all night thinking of what I‘ve done last year and maybe the way I tried too hard is against my destiny so the consequence is causing me as a self-destructive…. It cost me a roll of tissue, devious mentality, severe suffer and misbalancing brain that night.
06.01.10 In the morning I turn off my mobile phone because one of a friends she like to call in early morning everyday to share her lonely heart I always tell her that she is going through crisis 30 for a single girl and she need to be alone to ask herself what she doing and wants in life but she seem doesn’t understand that so I keep telling her how to handle with such crisis. But I don’t have a mood to listen to anyone since I have my own problem too. when I’m at work I don’t want to talk to anyone and don’t want to do a thing until they come and tell me that my salary has been paid. I bring my book bank to update make sure if everything is well done. (Thanks God).
Since knowing my salary has been paid I was so happy and I can talk more. Back home in the evening I was called friends and non stop talking while enjoy eating my spicy food. Almost midnight I got diarrhea it took me back and forth to toilet & bed for 3 hours before dead sleeping.
I can’t believe that night I dreamt of English Bob, he took me to a restaurant, order some Thai food and enjoy his food while asking if I want anything to eat or drink. I said no and at the same time I keep looking at him. There was a rice plate left in our table from previous client. I saw EB spoon rice from that plate to his and I was astonished of how he was such a down to earth man. His hands holding chicken leg while his teeth tearing chicken flesh and while he doing that he ask me “are you sure you don’t want anything? There is a coke in the freez if you like I can bring you but wait a minute†I sitting and look at he enjoy chicken while wait he finished, then he’d get me coke.
Suddenly there was a voice “It time to get up its 6 O’clock in the morning†(alarm clock) keeps repeating again and again till I woke up. Thought, Damn!!! I supposed to get a coke from EB. Why don’t just give me a minute to refresh with a cold drink before wake me up! it was 07.01.10 so it time to detox.
To be honest, I have no idea why I dream of EB since I hardly talk to him and meet him is quite rare chance. I still remember last time I saw him it was early Dec 2009. A friend whom I loan my guitar agreed to meet and bring back a guitar at where EB work. When I first earlier arrived there I saw EB in his khaki shirt, busying with his staff and he looks so handsome & sweet to them. Then I turn my back to him because I didn’t want him to recognize me, while i turning away I talking to myself “That is English Bob, Soda, you know himâ€. He was out to greet me and I gave him a peg (s) on his cheek and keep telling him how handsome he is while I pegging …lol…that was it…nothing more, nothing less… don’t get me wrong and don’t be jealous...it’s just a dream..lol...
In late evening I caused a severe migraine I guess its the affected of crying on 05.01.10 of not getting paid. My brain sore like thousand needles runing inside so I took 2 paracetamol + 1 migraine pill + 1 sleeping pill last night.
In this morning I feel better my brain is less sore and hopefully thing is going to be ok. I know I am a bi polar I guess this is the affected of my childhood suffered, which mean the situations can turn me into the extremely sad & happy than normal ppl.... Today at 11.12 AM I received an invitation letter from NZ delivery by DHL so maybe this is the right moment to SMILE…. 
:D haha!!
0 Comments
Recommended Comments