See? You all laughed at me when I was writing to my dear Angela, stuck in that terrible refugee camp in Dakar.
But now she has $300,000 dollars for me, and all I have to do is contact some guy in Africa who will send me the cheque without delay!
Hello my dear,
I am very happy to inform you about my success in getting the fund transferred under the co-operation of a new partner from Canada. Presently I am in Canada for investment projects with my new partner.
Meanwhile, I didn't forget your past efforts and attempts to help me .
Now you will need to contact Reverend Patrick Okan whom is the man of God to me when i was in Dakar, his name is Reverend Patrick Okan and his email address is as follows ( email@example.com ) Ask him to send you a certified cashier's cheque of $300.000.00 USD, which I prepared and kept for your compensation for all the past efforts you did to help me and attempts to assist me when i am suffering in the refugee camp in Dakar for the transfer of my fund. I appreciated your efforts at that time very much. So feel free and contact or get in touch with Rev. Patrick Okan to send you the cheque which i instructed him where to send you the cheque i kept for you.
Please do let me know immediately you receive the cheque from him, so that we can share our joy and happiness after all the sufferings at that time.
At the moment, I am very busy here because of the investment projects which me and the new partner are having at hand, finally, remember that I had forwarded instruction to Rev Patrick Okan on your behalf to receive that money. Therefore feel free to get in touch with him and he will send the cheque to you without delay.
Take care and bye for now.
So I think I will write to him...
I hope you don't mind me calling you 'Paddy', it's just that Patrick seems so formal when I know we are going to be such good friends in the future. I saw it in a heavenly vision sent directly from Our Father.
As you probably know, I am one of the saps who answered Angela's email from the refugee camp in Dakar. Was it you who took the saucy photo of her in the trilby hat? That was a great picture! You have a good future ahead of you in photography once you decide to retire from the Church of Duplicity and Deception.
Now Angela is safe in Canada and I hope one day to meet her in person. We have some plans to engage in some unnatural acts - I'm sure you understand, being a man of the cloth.
Anyway, enough of this rambling... What about the money? Angela said you have a cashier's cheque for me for $300,000. It's not exactly the 2 million we discussed before, but it'll help start up my new business of gun-running and white slavery (you might even be able to find me some contacts in Dakar)
Angela said you would send it to me 'without delay'. So I assume you can just post it or place it directly into my account without any major problems. I'm sure there won't be any complications and I won't be required to send you a clearance fee first.
So... pop that little fucker in an envelope and send it over. Ina couple of weeks, I'll be knee deep in AK47s and RPGs for some Arab guys I know.
Assuring you of my most sincere and honest attention at all times.
So long Paddy!
(Please remember that, as Angela has never once remembered to write it on a single email!)