Admin_2 Posted December 10, 2010 Report Share Posted December 10, 2010 Post some quotes you like here, but they can't be your own. Looking for funny, creative, and/or thought provoking quotes only. "If you're one in a million, there are 8 of you in Manhattan alone." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DANNO Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 when you've got them by the balls... their hearts and minds will follow. --Chuck Colson Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamveewan Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 Man can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air, but only for one second without hope†p.s. I really NEED HOPE now ... >_< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teddy Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse. Life is full of disappointments, and I'm full of life! Today is the last day of some of your life. Life is like a roll of toilet paper...the closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes...so have fun, think 'good thoughts' only, learn to laugh at yourself!!!!! Life is like a cucumber. one monent it is in your hand, the next it's up your arse. All quoted from the interstate.....I mean internet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 Ever notice how anything seems possible when you have no f*cking clue what you're talking about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 WC Fields.... "What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?" "I never drink water.... fish **** in it." "I always keep a stimulant handy in case I see a snake - which I also keep handy." Steven Wright... "Curiosity killed the cat... but for a while I was a suspect." "I talk to myself a lot. It bothers some people because I use a megaphone." "You can't have everything. I mean, where would you put it?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drlovelife8 Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 The Quran in Sura (Chapter) 2:223 says: Your women are your fields, so go into your fields whichever way you like . . . . (MAS Abdel Haleem, The Qur’an, Oxford UP, 2004)........ Peace. The Quran in Sura (Chapter) 2:223 says: Your women are your fields, so go into your fields whichever way you like . . . . (MAS Abdel Haleem, The Qur’an, Oxford UP, 2004) The Quran in Sura 2:228 says: . . . Wives have the same rights as the husbands have on them in accordance with the generally known principles. Of course, men are a degree above them in status . . . (Sayyid Abul A’La Maududi, The Meaning of the Qur’an, vol. 1, p. 165) The Quran in Sura 4:11 says: The share of the male shall be twice that of a female . . . . (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 311) The Quran in Sura 2:282 says: And let two men from among you bear witness to all such documents [contracts of loans without interest]. But if two men be not available, there should be one man and two women to bear witness so that if one of the women forgets (anything), the other may remind her. (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 205). The Quran in Sura 2:230 says: And if the husband divorces his wife (for the third time), she shall not remain his lawful wife after this (absolute) divorce, unless she marries another husband and the second husband divorces her. [in that case] there is no harm if they [the first couple] remarry . . . . (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 165) The Quran in Sura 4:24 says: And forbidden to you are wedded wives of other people except those who have fallen in your hands [as prisoners of war] . . . (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 319). The Quran in Sura 4:3 says: And if you be apprehensive that you will not be able to do justice to the orphans, you may marry two or three or four women whom you choose. But if you apprehend that you might not be able to do justice to them, then marry only one wife, or marry those who have fallen in your possession. (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 305) The Quran in Sura 4:129 says: It is not within your power to be perfectly equitable in your treatment with all your wives, even if you wish to be so; therefore, [in order to satisfy the dictates of Divine Law] do not lean towards one wife so as to leave the other in a state of suspense. (Maududi, vol. 1, p. 381) 2. Husbands may hit their wives even if the husbands merely fear highhandedness in their wives (quite apart from whether they actually are highhanded). 4:34 . . . If you fear highhandedness from your wives, remind them [of the teaching of God], then ignore them when you go to bed, then hit them. If they obey you, you have no right to act against them. God is most high and great. (Haleem,) The Quran in Sura 65:1, 4 says: 65:1 O Prophet, when you [and the believers] divorce women, divorce them for their prescribed waiting—period and count the waiting—period accurately . . . 4 And if you are in doubt about those of your women who have despaired of menstruation, (you should know that) their waiting period is three months, and the same applies to those who have not menstruated as yet. As for pregnant women, their period ends when they have delivered their burden. (Maududi, vol. 5, pp. 599 and 617,) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "if it moves, **** it. If it doesn't move, **** it just in case." (Dr Lowlife, 2008) :twisted: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted December 11, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?! Adam Sandler. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drlovelife8 Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "if it moves, f*ck it. If it doesn't move, f*ck it just in case."(Dr Lowlife, 2008) :twisted: And if it isn't even real, find a way to **** it just for the hell of it. Drlowlife, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky_house Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "And you my lady are ugly. But in the morning I shall be sober." Winston Churchill's supposed reply to Lady Astor, when she said to him, "Winston, you are drunk"." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "And you my lady are ugly. But in the morning I shall be sober."Winston Churchill's supposed reply to Lady Astor, when she said to him, "Winston, you are drunk"." Lady Astor; "If you were my husband, I'd put poison in your tea." Winston Churchill; "And if you were my wife, I'd drink it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky_house Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "no homo"...Rob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted December 11, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "Dude, never mix cough syrup and beer." Kennon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 We live in a world where John Lennon was murdered, yet Barry Manilow continues to put out ******* albums. God-dammit! If you're gonna kill somebody, have some ******* taste. I'll drive you to Kenny Rogers' house. I just have one of those faces. People come up to me and say, "What's wrong?" Nothing. "Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile." Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me alone? People often ask me where I stand politically. It's not that I disagree with Bush's economic policy or his foreign policy, it's that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left. They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do just as well – you just realize that it's not worth the ******* effort. There is a difference. I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. "I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs." "I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking." "Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets!" "Shut up! Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control. Here's Love Connection. Watch this and get fat and stupid. By the way, keep drinking beer, you ******* morons." (all Bill Hicks) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweet_sasi Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 "memories r the most precious things in life. u can't buy them, steal them, sell them, but u can share them. people live life for memories. 8) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eagle Posted December 12, 2010 Report Share Posted December 12, 2010 A chief called Lawyer, because he was a great talker, took the lead in the council, and sold nearly all the Nez Perce country. Chief Joseph Read more: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/c/chief_joseph.html#ixzz17r8a3jDG Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky_house Posted December 12, 2010 Report Share Posted December 12, 2010 The Koreans have a vegetarian version of the famous instant noodle snack. Its called Not Poodle. ..Jack Dee What I look forward to most on returning from India is a dry fart...Cricketer Phil Edmonds after a tour. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted December 12, 2010 Report Share Posted December 12, 2010 My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair. Rodney Dangerfield Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamveewan Posted December 12, 2010 Report Share Posted December 12, 2010 "I had a boyfriend who told me I’d never succeed, never be nominated for a Grammy, never have a hit song, and that he hoped I’d fail. I said to him, ‘Someday, when we’re not together, you won’t be able to order a cup of coffee at the ******* deli without hearing or seeing me." — Lady Gaga Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
koolbreez Posted December 14, 2010 Report Share Posted December 14, 2010 To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles. - Anonymous Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted December 14, 2010 Report Share Posted December 14, 2010 I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. "I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs." "I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking." "Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets!" "Shut up! Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control. Here's Love Connection. Watch this and get fat and stupid. By the way, keep drinking beer, you f*cking morons."(Bill Hicks) nice one !!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simppa79 Posted December 14, 2010 Report Share Posted December 14, 2010 Pity you get without asking, but envy you have to deserve. Hunger leaves by eating, wife by drinking. Better to have one screw loose than then tight. Bad get what he deserves, good leaves without. Majority means that all idiots are on same side. Crazy don't have problems, but the nurses... "Idiot proof" underestimates the idiots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyphil247 Posted December 15, 2010 Report Share Posted December 15, 2010 It don't matter if you get your appetite outside the house, so long as you bring it back home to the table. - a wise friend, Chi, che non lavora non fa l'amore. - a wise Italian Love doesn't put food on the table. - a wise father Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lollipop Posted December 15, 2010 Report Share Posted December 15, 2010 The beauty of a friendship begins just after an all time weak relationship ended. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.