Admin_2 Posted February 12, 2011 Report Share Posted February 12, 2011 Walk around Bangkok and you're bound to hear some strange conversations. I was having dinner tonight, and I said something that made me think of making this thread. I have no idea what I'm eating right now, but damn it tastes good. What are some funny, strange, or simply outrageous quotes or conversations you've heard in Thailand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted February 12, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2011 Oh yeah...I can't get over how open some Thais are about this one: On a first date: "Hi, I'm Pim." "Nice to see you, Pim. Please have a seat." "One second. I have diarrhea. I go toilet first." ":o ok :o" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnno Posted February 12, 2011 Report Share Posted February 12, 2011 thats what happens when you eat too much chilly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 14, 2011 Report Share Posted February 14, 2011 (edited) I love these so much I started a website where I've been collecting them. Thai politics is like being in prison or a gang. You need to have a few felonies under your belt just to get some respect. When I was just in the bathroom I saw some six foot lady boy go into one of the stalls with some Indian guy. And you know what? That doesnt even strike me as strange anymore. Farang Guy: So, did you like the movie Thai Girl: Which movie? Farang Guy: The one we just got done watching!! Overheard at Siam Paragon coming out of a movie theatre. Guy 1: This is the third night this week Ive gone out and gotten totally pissed. Guy 2: Congrats on that. Its only Tuesday. More on Overheard in Thailand Edited February 25, 2012 by FarangFarang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiAnt Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 "Yep. I'll just let this guy out into traffic." "Oh no. She's not allowed out in the evenings. She's barely 35 you know!" "Ok, less your foreigner discount, that'll be..." "You weren't indicating your intention to ride straight on." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 4 guys chatting together outside of work... A: Man I'd like to get to the beach B: Me too! I'd like to relax in the shade as well. C: Ya, but we don't have a car... D: Not to worry fellas...I've got a motorcycle! ABCD: YES!! Let's go!! Later on that evening... A: Officer, we had a bit to drink and the 4 of us were just cruising down a one way road, going the wrong way, minding our own business when this car comes out of no where and knocks us all off of the bike! Officer: The nerve of some people! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 You know you have a problem when you take more ****s in bar bathrooms than you do in your own bathroom. Rob, I'll let you take a guess at which mutual friend said this one :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I've heard loads... From a famous Thai bar owner... This is my brother.... He used to be a policeman. Then he did something bad. At Charley Brown's... You ruined our last night in Bangkok. You didn't tell us how strong the drinks are. And overheard at CBs... Then about 12 guys came in. All beautiful and with hard ons. I was f*cking one of them and Jack was f*cking the other, then we swapped...(and continued for faaar too long with waaay too much detail!)An overheard one half of a phone call NO! It's MY time and MY money. You can come down here and f*cking pick it up yourself!Shortly after a very rough ladyboy hooker arrived and collected 500 baht from him.My favourite (from a Romanian porn star) You know, you can do anything to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Rob, I'll let you take a guess at which mutual friend said this one :-) That's a tough one...I'd have to go with...David. Final answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
narak_mai Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 A couple of years ago in a Nana bar with my then girlfriend; butch ladyboy: "So you Fu*k your girlfriend, and I'll fu*k you...." Me: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FarangFarang Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 That's a tough one...I'd have to go with...David. Final answer. Sorry, Mr. JapAmerican. The correct answer was Scott. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin_2 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Sorry, Mr. JapAmerican. The correct answer was Scott. That's no fair. Scott said he doesn't take ****s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 That's no fair. Scott said he doesn't take ****s. Well apparently he does. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 One from the old The Big Mango website. Go-go dancer: What your job Guy: I am an engineer. What is your job? Go-go dancer: I go with man. Querida 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sukhumvit_Farang Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 This half of a conversation I overheard in Asia Book Store at the Emporium a few years back - from an elderly, hard-of-hearing farang man shouting into his phone to his "date" for the evening: "Can you meet me at my home? Yeah yeah, no problem, I will still pay your bar fine." He seemed oblivious to the fact that everyone else in the book store could overhear his conversation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I know who the first quote is from. :-) I've heard loads...From a famous Thai bar owner... At Charley Brown's... And overheard at CBs... (and continued for faaar too long with waaay too much detail!) An overheard one half of a phone call Shortly after a very rough ladyboy hooker arrived and collected 500 baht from him. My favourite (from a Romanian porn star) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I know who the first quote is from. :-) Some of the best snippets are sitting in bars . . . Cashier fiddling with her phone: How do you spell "Dick"? Another one of my all time favorites: Waitress: Can you help me? "How do you say, 'Please send some money so I can go visit my sister for her birthday'?" Me: Oh, you're going back home? Waitress: No, I just need some money Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Her: Do you speak Thai? Him: Not on Mondays. Catch me on Thursday and I speak it fluently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 A couple of years ago in a Nana bar with my then girlfriend;butch ladyboy: "So you Fu*k your girlfriend, and I'll fu*k you...." Me: Uh, no thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 A couple of years ago in a Nana bar with my then girlfriend;butch ladyboy: "So you Fu*k your girlfriend, and I'll fu*k you...." Me: so how much did the butch ladyboy cost u ??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Me: Do you have the iPhone 3Gs? Sales Girl: Yes, have. Me: You have it here, now? Sales Girl: Yes, have. Me: Okay, I'll take one. Sales Girl: Sorry, out of stock. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
narak_mai Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 so how much did the butch ladyboy cost u ??? Quite reasonable actually Ciaran, I dropped your name and she offered the same loyalty discount you get Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 More a seeing than hearing story. A drunken tourist was talking to a girl in Nana Liquid for around 30 mins......she then turned her attentions to his semi sober 'cough' Ex pat friend and they carried on the conversation for 15 mins or so. She started sms'n on her phone so I eerrrr the guy stopped talking to her. She then shows the guy the phone and it says 'I am deaf' I_Am_George was stunned :-O Querida 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falangboy Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 A friend of mine was visiting Bangkok not too long ago and was in one of the bars on Cowboy. We were watching one particularly fine young lady dance when I asked him what he thought. His reply was, "She has an awsome body. If only she had fake ****." During another evening in Nana I asked him about another very fine young lady. He said, "She's nice but she doesn't wear enough makeup." This is a guy who obviously spends far too much time looking at porn and not enough time in BKK. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted February 17, 2011 Report Share Posted February 17, 2011 Quite reasonable actually Ciaran, I dropped your name and she offered the same loyalty discount you get whattttttttttttt .... that lying b*tch told me "honey u take care me i don't work bar no more" well that's her f**king monthly allowance stopped !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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