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Need suggestion for "English skills improvement"


whitelotus
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Although i have studied , kept practicing and applying the skills in both my personal and working life, it seems like my eng skills are not improved as i desire for. For example, it's quite hard for me to yell or write sarcastic statement in the same meaning which i have in my brain.

Thus, i need suggestions from u guys both native and thai, so plz kindly give me the practically suggestions

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Actually, I don't think that you need to improve your English skills for that but rather have to know how to put your (Thai) thoughts into English without losing the meaning. As sarcastic, cynical and ironic thoughts most probably will not transfer well with a literal translation, I suggest that you google a bit (unfortunately, I cannot provide any suitable site) and I am sure you will find something that fits your needs. Good luck and looking forward to your first sarcastic posting :)!

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Any of these you don't get? I'll try and help:

"You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.

Now we know why some animals eat their own children.

Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.

Talk is cheap, but that's ok, so are you.

If we killed everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder…it would be an apocalypse!

This is an excellent time for you to become a missing person.

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

When I look into your eyes, I see straight through to the back of your head.

A sharp tongue does not mean you have a keen mind.

Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you any worse advice.

Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today.

Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?

Don't let your mind wander, it's far too small to be let out on its own.

Don't thank me for insulting you, it was a pleasure.

Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without you putting in so much effort to give us another?

He always finds himself lost in thought; it's unfamiliar territory.

I bet you get bullied a lot.

I can tell that you are lying, your lips are moving.

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

I don't mind you talking so much, as long as you don't mind me not listening.

I don't think you are a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others.

I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you one day.

I like you. People say I've got no taste, but I like you.

I used to think that you were a colossal pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.

I will defend, to your death, my right to my opinion.

I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass.

If you were twice as smart as you are now, you'd be absolutely stupid.

I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance.

I'm impressed, I've never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.

I've come across rotting bodies that are less offensive than you are.

Pardon me, but you're obviously mistaking me for someone who gives a damn.

People would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

She's the first in her family born without tail.

That man is cruelly depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

There are several people in this world that I find unbearably obnoxious, and you are all of them.

What he is lacking in intelligence, he more than makes up for in stupidity.

Whatever it is that is eating you, it must be suffering horribly.

What's wrong, don't you get any attention back home?

You are not even beneath my contempt.

You are not obnoxious like so many other people, you are obnoxious in a completely different and far worse way.

You grow on people, but so does cancer.

You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified.

You should do some soul-searching. You might just find one.

You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you're doing your best.

Your mind isn't so much twisted as badly sprained.

You're a habit I'd like to kick - with both feet.You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.

Now we know why some animals eat their own children.

Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.

Talk is cheap, but that's ok, so are you.

If we killed everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder…it would be an apocalypse!

This is an excellent time for you to become a missing person.

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

When I look into your eyes, I see straight through to the back of your head.

A sharp tongue does not mean you have a keen mind.

Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you any worse advice.

Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today.

Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?

Don't let your mind wander, it's far too small to be let out on its own.

Don't thank me for insulting you, it was a pleasure.

Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without you putting in so much effort to give us another?

He always finds himself lost in thought; it's unfamiliar territory.

I bet you get bullied a lot.

I can tell that you are lying, your lips are moving.

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

I don't mind you talking so much, as long as you don't mind me not listening.

I don't think you are a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others.

I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you one day.

I like you. People say I've got no taste, but I like you.

I used to think that you were a colossal pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.

I will defend, to your death, my right to my opinion.

I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass.

If you were twice as smart as you are now, you'd be absolutely stupid.

I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance.

I'm impressed, I've never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.

I've come across rotting bodies that are less offensive than you are.

Pardon me, but you're obviously mistaking me for someone who gives a damn.

People would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

She's the first in her family born without tail.

That man is cruelly depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

There are several people in this world that I find unbearably obnoxious, and you are all of them.

What he is lacking in intelligence, he more than makes up for in stupidity.

Whatever it is that is eating you, it must be suffering horribly.

What's wrong, don't you get any attention back home?

You are not even beneath my contempt.

You are not obnoxious like so many other people, you are obnoxious in a completely different and far worse way.

You grow on people, but so does cancer.

You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified.

You should do some soul-searching. You might just find one.

You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you're doing your best.

Your mind isn't so much twisted as badly sprained.

You're a habit I'd like to kick - with both feet."

http://www.tensionnot.com/jokes/one_liner_jokes/sarcastic_quotes

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@ ROB, i just realized that how much u can hate me and how worst u can think of me!!!!!!!!!!!!! , if that all statements were searched and written here while your brain was thinking of me!!!!!!!!!!!!!. tHX SO MUCH ROB for your effort and helpfulness, i think u are quite good at sarcastic and make ppl upset. My only questions is " are these statement written for me? if that so i wish all of them back to you beloved one in return. lol Thx u again Rob

Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Actually, I don't think that you need to improve your English skills for that but rather have to know how to put your (Thai) thoughts into English without losing the meaning. As sarcastic, cynical and ironic thoughts most probably will not transfer well with a literal translation, I suggest that you google a bit (unfortunately, I cannot provide any suitable site) and I am sure you will find something that fits your needs. Good luck and looking forward to your first sarcastic posting :)!

Right i agree with u and yah i confess that i google sometime, i'll try to post one here when i find the way how to write them properly , i mean the way that make some westerner been speechless after reading but it should take time to develop that skill but sure hopefully i can write one here someday if i still alive lol

Edited by whitelotus
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@ ROB, i just realized that how much u can hate me and how worst u can think of me!!!!!!!!!!!!! , if that all statements were searched and written here while your brain was thinking of me!!!!!!!!!!!!!. tHX SO MUCH ROB for your effort and helpfulness, i think u are quite good at sarcastic and make ppl upset. My only questions is " are these statement written for me? if that so i wish all of them back to you beloved one in return. lol Thx u again Rob

Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They were not meant for you. I copied them from the website to which I gave a link.

Does understanding sarcasm = intelligence?

For mankind, I hope that post was your attempt at sarcasm.

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They were not meant for you. I copied them from the website to which I gave a link.

Does understanding sarcasm = intelligence?

For mankind, I hope that post was your attempt at sarcasm.

I wrote those post by anger not intend to sarcasm and for me , sure sarcasm is not equally to intelligence 100% but to write it at least, your languages skills have to be in intermediate level or upper right? For example, your thai proficiency should be good enough to write thai sarcasm statement or any kind of complexity statements as novel, debate, poem.

Someone told me to do verbally abuse on some farang in polite manner and see if that farang can get it and be hurt, if so, she said my eng is in better level lol . So what do you think about this Rob????????????/

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I wrote those post by anger not intend to sarcasm and for me , sure sarcasm is not equally to intelligence 100% but to write it at least, your languages skills have to be in intermediate level or upper right? For example, your thai proficiency should be good enough to write thai sarcasm statement or any kind of complexity statements as novel, debate, poem.

Someone told me to do verbally abuse on some farang in polite manner and see if that farang can get it and be hurt, if so, she said my eng is in better level lol . So what do you think about this Rob????????????/

It was a good attempt, but judging from some of your past outbursts, it's hard to know if you're serious or joking. Thus, I didn't find much humor in your post...I tend to read your posts while imagining the wicked witch of the west behind an Acer laptop with a picture of Ciaran on a dart board right above that...just sayin.

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It was a good attempt, but judging from some of your past outbursts, it's hard to know if you're serious or joking. Thus, I didn't find much humor in your post...I tend to read your posts while imagining the wicked witch of the west behind an Acer laptop with a picture of Ciaran on a dart board right above that...just sayin.

I'll take your post as your compliment and thx to imagine me as a wicked witch but anything related to Ciaran????????/ . Rob, if my trustfulness level toward u, bill and p' Iain is in the highest level, may be we all three shall meet in person one day so that u can know me and imagine me in the right way next time :)

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I'll take your post as your compliment and thx to imagine me as a wicked witch but anything related to Ciaran????????/ . Rob, if my trustfulness level toward u, bill and p' Iain is in the highest level, may be we all three shall meet in person one day so that u can know me and imagine me in the right way next time :)

That was my first lesson in sarcasm. You must pay for future lessons.

Meet me at the flagpole after school, 3 PM.

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That was my first lesson in sarcasm. You must pay for future lessons.

Meet me at the flagpole after school, 3 PM.

LOLLLLLLLLLLLL u r so kind for giving me a free first lesson. About flagpole, where is the place, i have no idea,? and right now i am not in BKK ja may be we have to wait untill p' Iain available to come and visiting us in BKK by this dec? what do u think?

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