Jump to content

Why Men Dont Listen And Women Cant Read A Map...


anile
 Share

Recommended Posts

Woman who can't read map. Actually I can read a map just not very good at it. I have comments that I absolutely have a terrible sense of direction...

Go get it and enjoy your quiet moments with a nice commend Cheers..!!!! :D

**Let's you find the answer..on best seller book..at the bookshop Now!!

'' Why Men Dont Listen And Women Cant Read A Map " ...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

one would think, with all these 'best selling' help books coming out every year (yawn), that men and women would have figured all out by now. But really, the bottom line is, that its in BOTH best interests to never figure it out. Because as soon as we do, the whole mating 'game' would be no more.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Woman who can't read map. Actually I can read a map just not very good at it. I have comments that I absolutely have a terrible sense of direction...

Go get it and enjoy your quiet moments with a nice commend Cheers..!!!! :D

**Let's you find the answer..on best seller book..at the bookshop Now!!

'' Why Men Dont Listen And Women Cant Read A Map " ...

I am sorry, did you say somthing?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Woman who can't read map. Actually I can read a map just not very good at it. I have comments that I absolutely have a terrible sense of direction......

Some times being lost leads you to the most unexpected good surprises!

But as long as you have some idea of where your going in life you'll be ok even if your not good at reading maps.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

found this rather funny blog on ammaro.com. pretty much says it all (sorry its so long - blame the blogger)

Women talk too much & Men don't listen enough

Men don't listen.

To women, that is. I don't understand why, it's not like we do it on purpose; it's just something about the way we're made or so. I'm sure most of you appreciate the fact that, although part of the same general species (ie, human), men and women are different. All that talk of equality and being the same and so on is nonsense.

Think of it this way; all men (or almost all of them) love sports, love to play with electronics, gadgets and gizmos, get emotional about their cars and nothing else, usually have a tough exterior, and so on. All women, on the other hand (or almost all of them), are more in touch with their emotions, love clothes and colors and make up, go nuts over shopping, always talk about their feelings, etc.

Sure, the world is not all black and white so not every single man and woman fall under those stereotypes, but hey, you have to admit, many are pretty close. And some who don't fit the descriptions at all just might need a sex change.

Anyhoo...

Here's one thing about women. They talk too much.

Yep, whether you like to admit it or not, you women talk too much. Some women reading this right now are going to throw a fit, get angry about what I wrote, and then go meet some of their friends to talk about it. Yes. Talk, talk, talk... Yadda, yadda, yadda.. It's not your fault though; it's been scientifically proven that as women, your heart beat is linked to the amount you talk. If you stop talking for a long enough time period, you just die; so talking ends up being a survival instinct, I guess. And women love to talk about their feelings, how their day went, about their feelings, how they feel guilty for (over)eating a WHOLE plate of salad, and again, yes, about their feelings.

Now us men, we have better things to do. We need to be able to focus on the game showing on TV right now. We need to be able to make sure our brand new HD-DVD player and full surround system is hooked up the right way to our Plasma. We need to make sure the oil in the car is topped up. We need to test out the drill again just to make sure it's still working. You know, 'manly' things. And unfortunately, us men don't have the capacity in our minds to do more than one thing at a time (unless we're driving, during which we can do almost 10 things at once; ie, eat, talk on the phone, change the CD in the deck, shift from 3rd to 4th gear while overtaking two trailers all at the same time).

Unfortunately for Woman, she actually get married to Man. And when they both get home, Woman feels the urge to talk (because her heart-beat is slowing down and she needs to get it up and running again). So there goes Woman, talking about her day, how it went, the multitude of emotions she managed to go through, what she thinks of her co-worker's new dress etc, etc, etc..

Yadda.

Yadda.

Yadda..

So Man, obviously needing to attend to the fact that the quality of his surround system doesn't sound quite right, decides to, yup, 'it's time to play around with the wires'. You see, Man is a big child. He wants to play around with things. He doesn't want to sit and listen to complex issues about feelings, intricate detail about how someone's day could go, what they ate, what bag they wore with what shoes, etc.

So what does Man do? He stops listening. He blanks out completely. He looks like he's listening to Woman, but infact, his mind is somewhere completely different. He say 'yes' and 'okay' and 'then?' everytime Woman pauses for a few seconds, just to give her the impression that he's paying complete attention, but in reality, his one track mind is completely occupied with which cable is supposed to connect the front left speaker to the corresponding output port on the DVD player.

Mind you, he doesn't do it on purpose. No matter how hard Man tries, he just can't hear Woman. He sees her talking, he sees her lips moving, and he can pretty much be sure that something is coming out of her mouth. But in his head he could be hearing anything from the Gypsy Kings greatest hits CD to the sound effects from the latest Transformers movie. The odd three or four words would make it into his mind, however, so just incase she asks, "Did you even hear what I said?!", he would reply by composing a sentence sprinkled with those words and prove that he way, infact, listening.

It happened again, today. My wife called me when I was coming home from work, and the conversation (well, the part I heard anyway) went something like this:

"Hi honey, can you ..... by the supermarket ... get .... ...... ......, some tomatoes....., .... ,..... ,...... ..... , ok dear? Thanks. Bye"

Now, being the simple minded man that I am, I figured that I had actually heard the full conversation. Mind you, if you are not aware of the superpower us men have (ie, drowning out female conversation) then it can be at your disadvantage. Harness this power, however, and it will bring you much joy and tranquility in your life.

Anyway, back to the story. So now i'm at the supermarket, buying what she wanted; I pick up the tomates and... Hmm.. I can be pretty sure she mentioned FIVE items. Why do I only seem to remember one? Umm..

Ok, time to call her again. Uhh, honey, what did you say you wanted?

"Get ..... fat-free white cheese,..... ..... ..... tomatoes, and ..... ...., with the .... .... next to the .... counter, ok? bye..."

So I go to the cheese section, but realize there's like 3 million different varieties of fat-free cheese. Dammit, another phone call. What was that cheese you wanted hon? And what else?

"Yeah, .... was the Kraft fat-free cheese, and by the way, ..... ..... ....., .... you find a pack of ...., and a family pack diet coke"

I swear to god, I must have called her 6 times today while I was in the supermarket.. To pick up 5 things!

We don't do it on purpose, women. We swear we don't.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

slight tangent...but;

On ten beautiful deserted islands, in the middle of nowhere, the following people are stranded:

2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman

2 French men and 1 French woman

2 German men and 1 German woman

2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman

2 English men and 1 English woman

2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman

2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman

2 American men and 1 American woman

2 Thai men and 1 Thai woman

2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman

One month later, the situation is as follows:

One Italian man has killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a menage a trios.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman.

The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions.

The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them.

The Bulgarian men, after looking at their stalwart Bulgarian woman, have started swimming for home.

The two English men are still waiting for someone to come by and formally introduce them to the English woman.

The 2 Thai men have built a hut and just sit on the porch drinking beer all day, while the Thai woman looks longingly over at the other islands.

The Irish men began by dividing the island into North and South. They then quickly set up a high-volume distillery. Because they get sort of foggy after the first few liters of coconut whiskey -- causing their manhood to become quite limp -- sex never becomes a fighting issue... Anyway, they are quite satisfied knowing that at least the English men are not getting any.

The American woman keeps on bitching about her body being her own temple; the true nature of modern feminism; how she can do everything that they can do; about the necessity for her personal fulfilment; the equal division of all household chores; how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer; and how her relationship with her mother is improving. The two American men are contemplating suicide.

:lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...