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is gig just an excuse to slut around?


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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

This is the core truth, I believe. But as long as BOTH understand and agree to this truth, then no harm is done.

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

So what's it mean when a girl has giks? It's an excuse for what? Because girls do this as well.

All the Thai male friends I know over many years have had giks at some point. Without exception, there has always been a hidden agenda for the girl to have them as gik. Mostly they are hoping, or 'testing' to see if one day it could be more. I am sure there are many girls who do have giks and have the same attitude about is as guys (see SweetBarbie definition). But, from what I have seen, this is rare.

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I would say that it's not as rare as you might think. Women tend to be more covert about their liaisons and affairs. I'd bet at least 50% of the women on this site who are involved with someone in a long term relationship have had giks or extra-relationship affairs of one sort or the other.

You give them a little too much credit in my opinion.

Well, you could be right. But since, as you say, it is so covert, we may never know.

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

So what's it mean when a girl has giks? It's an excuse for what? Because girls do this as well.

Girls who have gigs/giks are probably / possibly find some NEW source of money, bf on hand is too dumb to know that they have an affair, feeling unsecure with current bf then looking for MORE secure relationship etc.

IMO, if your partner has an affair (cute name gigs/giks, WHATEVER !) that could be mean your relationship with him/her going down hill or reach the end of tunnel

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

So what's it mean when a girl has giks? It's an excuse for what? Because girls do this as well.

Girls who have gigs/giks are probably / possibly find some NEW source of money, bf on hand is too dumb to know that they have an affair, feeling unsecure with current bf then looking for MORE secure relationship etc.

IMO, if your partner has an affair (cute name gigs/giks, WHATEVER !) that could be mean your relationship with him/her going down hill or reach the end of tunnel

interesting. so girls who gik are prostituting themselves and they are justified because the bf is too stupid to catch them? I dont know why so many Farang guys say they cant understand your posts. This one seems crystal clear.

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

So what's it mean when a girl has giks? It's an excuse for what? Because girls do this as well.

Girls who have gigs/giks are probably / possibly find some NEW source of money, bf on hand is too dumb to know that they have an affair, feeling unsecure with current bf then looking for MORE secure relationship etc.

IMO, if your partner has an affair (cute name gigs/giks, WHATEVER !) that could be mean your relationship with him/her going down hill or reach the end of tunnel

interesting. so girls who gik are prostituting themselves and they are justified because the bf is too stupid to catch them? I dont know why so many Farang guys say they cant understand your posts. This one seems crystal clear.

It's just my humble opinion ja, P jack. But most interesting part is "why so many farang GUYS say they cant understand my posts" ! I think there have 2 possibilities 1. my poor english 2. their (those farang guys) attitude :-). What do you think ??

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

thats the best definition yet

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Having gigs/giks simply is an excuse for a guy saying to someone that i do not want to spend a lot of time with you, i do not want to be seen in public with you, i do not want my friends to know you, i can not have a future with you or i can not spend the rest of my life with you..... but i want to stick my penis in you, though we could go out if you really want to (if we have to), as long as you do not call me too often so my girlfriend does not get suspicious.

thats the best definition yet[/quote

But it's still a very one-sided definition. What little experience I have on this topic it seems that I mostly hear the gik topic brought up by females. Again, I admit I have very little experience here relative to many of the long term ex-pats and locals. ..jusy my 10 cents adjusted for inflation...

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So... a gig/gik can be someone you go to the movies with?

Have coffee with?

And no sex

Oh right... I remember we used to call those 'friends'.

If you aren't having sex with them, why the need for a separate word? I'd like to know what percentage of gigs are purely platonic.

The gig culture is getting out of hand (IMO). Teenage girls are openly bragging about having multiple gigs. That leads to more STD's and unwanted (and unsupported) babies.

Thailand is a tough enough place to be female... it's foolish to think that sleeping around can do anything to improve their lives.

If you have a boy/girlfriend, you shouldn't have a gig. Giving it a cute name doesn't make it any different to sleeping around.

Well said, I always thought people we hang out with are friends, and a MASSIVE percentage of people who called friends gigs/kik/giks ending nailing them.

its slutty

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I always thoght that having ¡Ôê¡ kik for a single guy or woman was

a way to have sex without too much involvement.

Nothing wrong in this if you are not ready for a stable relationship but you are attracted by someone and both enjoy this kind of "game".

Different is when she/he has kik during a relationship. The couple may agree on having some experience outside the relationship, but for most people those kind of agreement doesn't work long before ending in a disaster... it needs too much trust, openmind, trust and trust.

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We need to differentiate between three scenarios:

1. A situation in which you already have a bf/gf, you already are in a committed relationship. Here, having a gik on the side, without your bf/gf knowing is cheating and never good. It does not matter if you cheat with a gik, an ex bf/gf, a one-night stand, or somebody you pay for sex. It may mean the end of your relationship or is at least a sign of serious problems.

2. Alternatively, you are single and have a gik, which then means you are looking for a NSA (no strings atttached) kind of deal that allows you to experience intimacy, sex, and closeness to another human without the usual commitment. As long as both partners are cool with this, I don't see a problem here.

3. Gik with no sex or desire should be called a friend (as was already mentioned)

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2. Alternatively, you are single and have a gik, which then means you are looking for a NSA (no strings atttached) kind of deal that allows you to experience intimacy, sex, and closeness to another human without the usual commitment. As long as both partners are cool with this, I don't see a problem here.

Right Ralf - those three scenarios are exactly right. But the 'gig' culture here has grown out of hand.

This cute idea of a 'cinema gig' and a 'dinner gig' just doesn't make sense. Those people are friends.

A gig is almost always a secret lover.

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in my experiances i have found that a gik is just a special friend that you can talk to share secretes hang out and even have sex without any real commitment. but a man that gives money and gifts to a girl and the only thing he gets in return is sex. well that is just prostitution wether you admit it or not. well thats what ive gathered so far.

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Every one seems to have an opinion and there are big differences.

If a female wants to do,who is the one to judge unless you really know the full story?

Myself I know guys that all they want is some one to talk to and screw now and again and happy to pay for that type of friendship or privelage,and even to keep their own marriage in one piece.

Some think guys are ok to do,but ladies are not?Why?

Same same,I prefer a solid relationship,marriage where theres trust & love along with peace.

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i think being slutty is just an excuse to use the word 'gik.'

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

it's WRONG. it's totally horrifying---it's demeaning to sluts that rather than be proud of their contribution to society, they cover it up with the work 'gik.'

I think it's awesome. Exciting. And more common that most would want to know.

Each to their own, whatever makes you happy.

This coming from the same guy that said that the danger of car bombs in Kabul was exciting!

But which bit is exciting for you, being the slut/gik or having one?

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2. Alternatively, you are single and have a gik, which then means you are looking for a NSA (no strings atttached) kind of deal that allows you to experience intimacy, sex, and closeness to another human without the usual commitment. As long as both partners are cool with this, I don't see a problem here.

Right Ralf - those three scenarios are exactly right. But the 'gig' culture here has grown out of hand.

This cute idea of a 'cinema gig' and a 'dinner gig' just doesn't make sense. Those people are friends.

A gig is almost always a secret lover.

Completely correct..... if it meant a secret 'friend' once it appears to have changed meaning now.

Like gay used to mean happy, now means queer... gik used to mean a friend your partner wouldn't like you knocking around with to someone you will eventually ****.

If you hang out plutonically (is that a real word?) it is friendship.

what worries and peeves me is the number of chicks and guys in relationships gikking their arses off....... and really hurting people in the process... who then gik to get revenge until they get over it, thus hurting more people who join the club.............pathetic

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i think being slutty is just an excuse to use the word 'gik.'

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

it's WRONG. it's totally horrifying---it's demeaning to sluts that rather than be proud of their contribution to society, they cover it up with the work 'gik.'

I think it's awesome. Exciting. And more common that most would want to know.

i think if "slut" came to be considered a compliment---THAT would be awesome, exciting and even useful.

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i think being slutty is just an excuse to use the word 'gik.'

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

it's WRONG. it's totally horrifying---it's demeaning to sluts that rather than be proud of their contribution to society, they cover it up with the work 'gik.'

I think it's awesome. Exciting. And more common that most would want to know.

i think if "slut" came to be considered a compliment---THAT would be awesome, exciting and even useful.

Yeah, but that's just so you don't have to change your t-shirt collection.

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We need to differentiate between three scenarios:

1. A situation in which you already have a bf/gf, you already are in a committed relationship. Here, having a gik on the side, without your bf/gf knowing is cheating and never good. It does not matter if you cheat with a gik, an ex bf/gf, a one-night stand, or somebody you pay for sex. It may mean the end of your relationship or is at least a sign of serious problems.

2. Alternatively, you are single and have a gik, which then means you are looking for a NSA (no strings atttached) kind of deal that allows you to experience intimacy, sex, and closeness to another human without the usual commitment. As long as both partners are cool with this, I don't see a problem here.

3. Gik with no sex or desire should be called a friend (as was already mentioned)

Perfectly said... That's the opinion I tried to explain before.

One thing important in situation 2 is the following:

"As long as both partners are cool with this, I don't see a problem here. "

Problems often comes out when for one of the partner the relationship means more than to have a "f**k buddy" (sorry)

And it often happend.... Often people think that they are not involved sentimentally, but when they discover (i.e.) that they are not the only "Kik" the partner is dating then...... I guess you see what I mean.

It can be a fair "agreement", but it is dangerous and most of the time someone end up hureted

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