The new politics of desire

[FarangFarang]

Sexuality meets globalisation _ Thais are getting involved in more international relationships but the dynamics are changing

Published: 21/08/2011 at 12:00 AM

Newspaper section: Spectrum

The face of Thai sexuality is changing in small fault lines that may soon represent a seismic shift in the way the Land of Smiles is viewed.

While the perception of international relationships here in some Western eyes may be of older, overweight, oversexed tourists trawling bars for Thai partners, the post-Vietnam era cliche of American servicemen on R&R is being challenged by and is also accelerating new trends.

The sexualisation of Thais in foreign eyes has had an effect on international partnerships, as Thais try to distance themselves from the misperception of being tied to a foreign partner for monetary reasons.

As citizens of a middle-income country where status is important, middle class Thais have much to lose or gain by being involved with a foreign partner. In this light, several trends are emerging. Thais seeking foreign partners are more often gazing over the fence at East Asian partners. The "white Asian" ideal is gradually replacing the "white European".

There is more migration to the countryside, with German and Swiss enclaves in Isan and Thai village women struggling to fit into life in the austere towns and cities of northern Europe. Even as such migrations increase, their demographics are changing, as many Western men are younger and willing to forsake jobs and connections back home to build a new life on the farm.

Young Western women are also finding holiday romance in Bangkok's backpacker areas and the beach full moon parties, with Thai lotharios more than willing to accommodate them for the night or the length of their holiday.

The Thai middle class has grown quickly and continues to expand. With the rise in income and education, Thais have more access to international trends and popular culture, and globalisation and social media are playing a major role in the changes.

From the popularity of English in texting and Facebook to the pop culture tsunami of the Korean wave, the signs of globalisation are everywhere.

We have Korean beauty products, Japanese manga and Hollywood movies, and many celebrities are luk krueng or light-skinned _ that is, those that look more Northeast Asian or Western.

Spectrum spoke to those at the coalface of the changes, as well as anthropologists and academics who presented papers on transnational romance recently at the International Conference on Thai Studies, and these are their stories.

EASTERN PROMISES

"He looks uglier than five years ago!" says Apple* of Barry, her long-time American boyfriend. "And we have a lot of communication problems."

Apple's first foreign boyfriend was a Frenchman she met on the internet. After only a short message exchange, he abruptly flew to Bangkok to be with her.

"For two months it was nice, but it was like a holiday romance for him. Bangkok corrupted him," she says. "Eventually he fell in love with a massage girl."

Another complaint she has about being with Barry is that sometimes waiters and clerks assume she's Barry's bargirl.

Like many young middle class women, though, Apple has lost interest in dating Thai men. "They have an ego," she explains, "where everything is about them. Foreigners see themselves as part of the wider world. They have hobbies and other interests.

"But farang [culture] is still far away," she adds. "Asians are closer."

Apple, 30, works for a fashion magazine and is looking for a Japanese man to replace Barry. She finds men in Korean and Japanese dramas and movies "dreamy".

"The image is kind, gentle and handsome," she says. "I know it's not the reality and more of a media depiction.

"Also it's the 'whitening' culture," she adds. "Maybe because the Chinese in Thailand do well in business and popular culture. It makes whiter skin more appealing."

Woramon Sirinopakul, 23, works for a television station and thinks nationality is less important than it used to be. "I've started to consider each person in his behaviour rather than culture," she says. "Now it's very easy to meet foreigners. For culture, the more unique, the more attractive."

As for dating Thai men, she is equivocal: "Thais are fine as long as they have something to talk about. The big advantage is I can say anything without language problems."

"But all my life I see ton of bad Thai men. For a date, yes," she concludes. "But for marriage, no."

Ms Woramon finds Europeans "artistic and charming" and more attractive than Americans, who "tend to think that everything is easy to understand like a Hollywood movie". The British are especially appealing to her: "The different accents are charming, and I like Brit-pop."

Along with British, though, she finds the most attractive men her age to be the Japanese. "I know not every Japanese man is attractive," she says, "but media from Japan _ manga, anime, movies _ is what I love to consume. We'll always have something to talk about."

For middle class Thai women or gay men, says Dredge Byung'chu Kang of Emory University in the US, who presented a paper at last month's International Conference on Thai Studies, being seen with an older Westerner often lowers their perception of status, in their own eyes or those of others, because of the country's high-profile sex tourism industry and its roots in the Vietnam War, when the women with the most proximity to Western men were those offering sex for money.

Today, large numbers of Western men still come to the Kingdom for sex and some hotels and restaurants have posted "no Thai" policies to distance themselves from the sex trade.

Still, the number of Asian sex tourists visiting Thailand probably outstrips the number of Western ones.

In a country where the line between appearance and substance is indistinct, the way a relationship looks matters. Thais with means try to avoid being seen as someone's "bargirl" or "money boy", both to avoid judgement by waiters, shop clerks and other strangers and to be recognised on their own merits.

Whatever the truth of an arrangement, there is less of a stigma risk when seen with a Far Eastern partner.

I truncated the story because it was rather long and the forum software wouldn't take it but you can read the rest here.

http://www.bangkokpost.com/news/investigation/252745/the-new-politics-of-desire

The author is a little all over the place in this investigative report but some good points are made. Not that I agree with everything but the author at least departs from some stereotypes and tries to look past the obvious.