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Oxymorons


XCHANELX

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1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27. Christmas oxymoron: What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

28. (I always wanted to know) Why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway??????

29. Why do people say "agree to disagree" when they are truely disagree?

30. "Awfully pretty" ????

31. Eyes Wide Shut??? ( wallace this one's for u lol )

32. Future history,,,,so what will it be in the future,,,,history?

33. Free Credit,,,,if it's free why did i get all the charges?

34. Finally again,,,, if it's been finalized,,,why finally again?

35. Go ahead, back up! so do they want you to go ahead or back up?

36. Good junk,,,,if it's junk why is it good?

37. Gentleman bandit,,,,since when is a bandit is gentleman? either bandit or gentleman pick one.

38. "My worst favorite" how can it be your favorite when it's your worst.

39. "New used cars" it can't be new if it's used.

40. RUBBER CEMENT

41. Real fantasy,,,,so is it real or is it fantacy?

42. Silent alarm,,,,if it's silent can we hear it when it went off?

43. "The alarm went off" it shouldnt make any noise if it went off,,,why dont people say " The alarm went on"

44. Soft porn?????

45. Sound of silence,,,,what is it sound like?

46. The Peace War,,,,do we have to create war to gain peace?

47. True lies????

48. Terribly Pleased,,,,why is it terrible if ur pleased?

49. Virtual reality????

50. Turned up missing ,,,,so did it turned up or still missing?

feel free to add urs

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1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27. Christmas oxymoron: What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

28. (I always wanted to know) Why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway??????

29. Why do people say "agree to disagree" when they are truely disagree?

30. "Awfully pretty" ????

31. Eyes Wide Shut??? ( wallace this one's for u lol )

32. Future history,,,,so what will it be in the future,,,,history?

33. Free Credit,,,,if it's free why did i get all the charges?

34. Finally again,,,, if it's been finalized,,,why finally again?

35. Go ahead, back up! so do they want you to go ahead or back up?

36. Good junk,,,,if it's junk why is it good?

37. Gentleman bandit,,,,since when is a bandit is gentleman? either bandit or gentleman pick one.

38. "My worst favorite" how can it be your favorite when it's your worst.

39. "New used cars" it can't be new if it's used.

40. RUBBER CEMENT

41. Real fantasy,,,,so is it real or is it fantacy?

42. Silent alarm,,,,if it's silent can we hear it when it went off?

43. "The alarm went off" it shouldnt make any noise if it went off,,,why dont people say " The alarm went on"

44. Soft porn?????

45. Sound of silence,,,,what is it sound like?

46. The Peace War,,,,do we have to create war to gain peace?

47. True lies????

48. Terribly Pleased,,,,why is it terrible if ur pleased?

49. Virtual reality????

50. Turned up missing ,,,,so did it turned up or still missing?

feel free to add urs

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It has nothing to do with English. The contradictions come from language itself which functions in duality.

I only know what "large" is because I know at the same time what "small" is. It's always relative (or in duality).

Someting "is" because I also know what it means when it "is not". Everything always comprises its duale opposite. I don't know what peace is if I wouldn't know what war is.

But therein doesn't lie a real problem. The problem comes when I am in a situation which is not favourable. I only know this because at the same time I also know what is favourable. The misery begins when I start acting on my non-favourable situation in order to improve it. What happens is that I confirm my non-favourable situation ... and reaching the opposite (the favourable) becomes a struggle. Then you are "fighting" for "peace", for instance.

But many of your examples have other explanations as well. "After dark" actually comes from "after it became dark", etc ...

But here's a final one: how can you know that you weren't alive, say 100 years ago?

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it changed from good to why is that? Because kids talk, we communicate which makes language goes round and just doesn't make sence ... Don't you think? But that was the reason i could think of ...

x Ex ^

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