Today I heard a very funny definition of 'communication':

I'll try to interpret  from Dutch (in Dutch: 'zo dicht mogelijk langs elkaar heen praten'):

comunication is:

'the closest people can get to talking at cross-purposes'

or maybe: 'as close as people can get to talking at cross-purposes', what sounds better to a native?

Don't know whether it sounds as funny as in Dutch, or whether it makes sense at all....

the problem is "at cross-purposes" i've read it over and over trying to think what it should mean.. but i just can't get it.. hmmmm maybe the problem is really "talking" had to look up cross-purpose and find "a contrary aim"

so maybe "as close as people can get to understanding when their objectives are contrary"

In my dictionary 'langs elkaar heen praten' is interpreted as 'talking at cross-purposes'. Off course it sometimes is impossible to interpret some specific idiomes from one language to another language. I'll try to explain the meaning of 'langs elkaar heen praten'.

zo dicht mogelijk - as close/near as possible, as near as one can get

langs elkaar heen- near: 'to meet each other', but more: 'passing by each other';

praten - to talk

'langs elkaar heen praten' is also connotative to 'not actually listening or talking to each other precisely and attentively', because of different aims / different background / different refference et cetera. ----->

Like the joke of the rabbit and the baker. One day the rabbit comes to see the baker and says: 'Are you selling any carrot cake?' The baker replies with 'no I'm very sorry rabbit, I don't bake carrot cake' The other two days the same thing happens again. Until the baker thinks of baking a very nice and delicious carrot cake for the rabbit. Rabbit runs into the baker again and says 'are you seling anyl carrot cake?' Baker replies happily: 'Today I have one for sale!'

Rabbit: 'Disgusting eh?'

So, you'll never totally meet each other in understanding.... when talking to each other. Communication will go as far as the nearest one can get in saying - and for the person to understand - different things.

There will always be a discrepancy in what you want to say, and the message the other receives.

>It's not: "as close as people can get to understanding when their objectives are contrary", thank you very much Stephen!!

Maybe: the closest people can get in delivering and receiving a message, while knowing that neither one listens nor talks accurately and attentively.

It's missing the point

"There will always be a discrepancy in what you want to say, and the message the other receives." Yes this is quite true. An understanding I trying to keep in mind well attempting to communicate. This can become painfully obvious in a relationship, where as other times it might not be quite as obvious. I find the only solution really is for each party to confirm their understanding of what the other has said and seek confirmation or correction of that understanding as need.

Thanks Stephen! I am pretty sure I can't translate the funny side of my quote.... Only Dutchies will understand, maybe a comment from them? If they will visite my journal at all? Probably not... There are quite some Thai people in Amsterdam, but I don't see them here on TF....

You are right Stephen, quote: 'I find the only solution really is for each party to confirm their understanding of what the other has said and seek confirmation or correction of that understanding as need', unquote.

This is what I constantly do in a relationship.

Communication, non-communication, body language, my perception: it's so complicated! But a mirror I need!

cheers mate!

Hmmmm...the body language is fine for me na ...errr before Dutch lesson begin. ;P

I asked a friend who's interpreter Dutch-English. She said this is poetry. She couldn't translate it.