Before i start this journal i wanna say that i have a bloodphobia... i can't see.. if i see it, my hands will shaked..and faint (sometime)

After i work in the hospital, i still have bloodphobia i really hate to go to operating room to set up the video cam (for broadcast to somewhere), i hate to go to the delivery room cuz i hate to see alot of blood yuck...

Then 7 years pass by, may be cuz i admitted in the hospital 2 times.. and check my blood very month, see/take the medical photos and video alot... no matter reason i just feel nothing.

Right now i'm working on a medical video about the surgery ... an hour ago, my colleages, Chick, she is a unit offficer came in... she saw the screen and the monitor full of blood and colon...she screamed pretty loud... it scare her... damn i just look at her and the monitor felt like there was nothing why u scared....hehehe

Then i think about myself if it was 7 years ago.... i'd scream and keep my eyes close, lol

may be now i'm just a person who have no feelings at all.

u know, it makes me think about the outside beauty, why ppl care about it that much?? cuz inside our body, beneath our skin cover.. we are all the same, errr someone might different, they might have the ugly lungs, fatty hearts ... right?

>> ( àÅ×ôÊÒ´¡ÃèÒÂ) <<

Ahahaha !! cool word =)

i love u the way u are :-))

àÅ×ô àÅ×ô àÅ×ô!!!!!!!!!!! ¡ÅÑÇ! Hope everything is find with you all sister....I hate blood too!

surgery situations are usually controled and have never bothered me. But in other situations its horrible for me-To see somebody hurt and their body falling apart. With empathy facing hurt and mortality is not so nice.

YEs, beauty stretches a long way (before we even get to the surface of our skins, and way beyond that point, bouncing and reflecting on it's way)