Two Irish engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.

A blonde walked by and asks what they are doing.

Paddy said: "We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole, but we don't have a ladder"

The blonde took a spanner from her purse, loosened a few bolts and laid the flagpole down. She then pulled a tape measure from her pocket, took a few measurements and announced that it was eighteen feet and six inches. She then walked off.

Mick said: "Ain't that just like a blonde! We need the height and she gives us the length"

Paddy is sitting, trying to catch fish through the ice, when he hears a loud booming voice say: "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE HERE!!"

PADDY SAYS "HOLY MARY! IS THAT YOU YOURSELF THERE GOD?"

The voice booms back " NO YOU IDIOT!! ITS THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK!"

hahahahaaaaaaaaaa - love it !!