1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland , CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, during which the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka , Kansas Kiwi Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING? A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart." "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted. "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! In Modesto , CA , Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (Hellooooooo)!

8. THE GRAND FINALE!!! Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat, going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition: The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
They still had the trailer attached to the bottom of the boat.
 

hypermanic, Thanks for the "Laugh" Funny!!!!!!!!!

Only in the US

number 2 is good>

Thanks ............. enjoyed that

Awwww, you pulled a Britney, you forgot to list the multitude of antics by BS, Britney Spears! Appropriate initials anyway. I suppose you could have just made one plain entry: "Britney Spears" that would be self explanatory.

I don't follow paparazzi news, but when stupid reaches ABSURD levels, I have to go beyond the headline. I recently read that Britney barricaded herself in her mansion with police in front for 3 hours. Paparazzi field day! She was described as being high on something. Her attorney made a public statement that "she is impossible to represent" (I guess the greedy celebrity attorney had enough money and didn't want hers).

Also listed were a few past Britneys, She shaved her head, (great idea for a public performer, GO Britney!) beat a car with an umbrella, was photographed in public not wearing any underwear and was photographed going into a hotel with one of the paparazzi that follow her everywhere. It was also noted that when she travels she stops at EVERY gas station on the way and goes into the bathroom. (great travel companion, if you like gas stations).

Also, her mother just wrote a book, about parenting, but the book was just shelved indefinitely by publishers, when Britney's 16 year old sister was confirmed to be pregnant. WOW, I can see all the Moms everywhere snapping that book up so they can have kids just like Britney :-)

Have you pulled a Britney lately?

"top morons of 2007 (so far !!)"

YOU forgot to mention yourself:)

Sorry, had to be done LOL

That was pretty awesome! good one

fishingdude - glad u like tha larfs & more will follow.

alexbkk - weeeeeeeeellllllllllllll let's say the majority are in the US !!

GermanUSA - Britney . . . enjoyed that 55555555555555

Stu - so where does that put you? Actually absurdly crazy would be a better definition for me. How you doing anyway?

Peterh61 - and I wonder which moron will live at that Washington address next?

Do I see a trend here? How do you say California. No surprise here. Now you know why I didn't stay.

Like it.. quite funny Keep posting..

I like #6 the most

primetime : you meant.. 4 morons from CA in above 8 stories ? ^_*

Add G.W. Bush to that!