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China Southern Airlines Announcement...

[Pre-take off announcement on a China Southern Airlines Flight].  This is true story of what  was heard on a recent  flight from Shenzhen to Qingtao .                 Chinese Air Stewardess   'Good afternoon, Ladies and the German. This is your cheap purser Wang Lui speaking. On behalf of China Sudden Airlines, I would like to welcome you on board our Bowling 737 from Shenzhen to Qingtao. Members of my crew speak Chinese and other languages that you do not know. It is a great pressure servi

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iBatch

 

I wanna find this guy and marry him, NOW!

Are you my soul mate? SWM in dead-end job seeks dumpy neurotic for mutual psychological torture, tepid sex, and co-dependency. I enjoy drinking, smoking, pornography, and self-righteous indignation. I can't stand movies, and the last album I bought was The Marshall Tucker Band's Greatest Hits. I have middling intelligence but try to appear smarter by affecting a world-weary air, memorizing useless facts, and chuckling at my own mean-spirited, agenda-driven jokes. I'm 40, but look 50 and feel

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iBatch

 

Mummy is a Pole Dancer!

For homework, a class in NSW were asked to draw their parents at work.   This is Jessica's drawing: Here's the letter the teacher received the next day:           Dear Mrs. Jackson,  I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer.    I work at Bunnings and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week after the floods hit.    I told her we sold out every single shovel we had and then I found one more in stock and several people were fighting o

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iBatch

 

Funny

http://www.coolspacetricks.com/comment-graphics/funny/81755/'>                  

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iBatch

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