Let's laugh - Why did America choose this guy?

[Goodghost]

From George Bush...

People say, how can I help on this war against terror? How can I fight evil? You can do so by mentoring a child; by going into a shut-in's house and say I love you.

There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you.

Fool me - you can't get fooled again.

I'm thrilled to be here in the bread basket of America because it gives me a chance to remind our fellow citizens that we have an advantage here in America - we can feed ourselves.

I'd rather have them sacrificing on behalf of our nation than, you know, endless hours of testimony on congressional hill.

And so, in my State of the - my State of the Union - or state - my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation - I asked Americans to give 4,000 years - 4,000 hours over the next - the rest of your life - of service to America. That's what I asked - 4,000 hours.

It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber.

Russia is no longer our enemy and therefore we shouldn't be locked into a Cold War mentality that says we keep the peace by blowing each other up. In my attitude, that's old, that's tired, that's stale.

Columbia carried in its payroll classroom experiments from some of our students in America.

The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself.

One year ago today, the time for excuse-making has come to an end.

I think the American people - I hope the American - I don't think, let me - I hope the American people trust me.

There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like.

The law I sign today directs new funds and new focus to the task of collecting vital intelligence on terrorist threats and on weapons of mass production.

I was proud the other day when both Republicans and Democrats stood with me in the Rose Garden to announce their support for a clear statement of purpose: you disarm, or we will.

First, we would not accept a treaty that would not have been ratified, nor a treaty that I thought made sense for the country.

This administration is doing everything we can to end the stalemate in an efficient way. We're making the right decisions to bring the solution to an end.

Ann and I will carry out this equivocal message to the world: Markets must be open.

We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House - make no mistake about it.

I am mindful not only of preserving executive powers for myself, but for predecessors as well.

I'm hopeful. I know there is a lot of ambition in Washington, obviously. But I hope the ambitious realize that they are more likely to succeed with success as opposed to failure.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[JackyB]

How about this point of view?

China and Russia are big countries.

When world leaders met at the recent G8 summit, President Bush was caught cursing, chewing like a cow, and massaging the shoulders of Germany?s female chancellor on camera. He was also recorded by an open mic informing a Chinese official?reportedly the Chinese president?that China and Russia are, quote, ?big? countries.

As if this is something the Chinese president doesn?t already know.

The whole world seems to be treating Bush?s G8 performance as final proof of his long rumored idiocy at the moment. I understand why they would think this way. After all, he?s the most powerful man in the universe. He shouldn?t be all but a pee stain away from behaving like somebody?s puppy.

But someone needs to stick up for the president on this one. And if no one else has the courage to do it, then that someone might as well be me.

George Bush may, indeed, be a moron. Most of us will never know, because most of us will never meet him. But if he is, the way he behaved at the G8 still failed to prove it.

Telling the Chinese president that China?s a big country isn?t a sign of mental midgetry. It?s a sign of social ineptness.

The G8 didn?t prove Bush is stupid. It basically proved he?s me.

What do I mean by this? Well, not literally me, of course. And not just me, either. But people like me. And more specifically, guys like me. All across America, there are millions of men who can?t make it through an evening without saying something stupid. It?s not hard to spot us. We?re the ones whose wives say, ?Stop it. You?re embarrassing me,? every ten to fifteen minutes.

I?ve always known I was one of these men. But it?s only now, with help from a very candid camera, that I realize George Bush is one of these men, too.

Take the way he dropped the s-bomb, for instance. I once got in trouble at a small social gathering for mentioning how my roommate had named his pet frogs ?F? and ?F? (which was short for a four-letter word, which wasn?t Fred). Or take Bush?s amazingly painful attempt at small talk with the Chinese president. That was pure me also. I rarely have anything of substance to say to other grown-ups. When I say something stupid, it?s usually because I?m just trying to think of something?anything?to say.

After all, keeping my mouth shut would make me look as out of place and disinterested as I am.

Of course, you could make the case that the president and I are much different people, living much different lives. You could even make the case that presidents ought to be able to talk to other presidents. They shouldn?t be disinterested. We?ve been spoiled by smooth-talking commanders-in-chief in this country. Bill Clinton, for instance, could unlatch women?s bras with the sound of his voice.

But a wise man once said people get the leaders they ask for. And speaking from personal experience, if George Bush is the kind of guy I think he is, then he?s the most fitting leader we could ask for in this American moment.

Why? Because the men whose wives ?can?t take them anywhere? are usually the same men who let shells of themselves inhabit their bodies and inhibit their minds for 40 hours a week, every week. They?re the nameless, faceless drones working nameless, faceless jobs in office parks across the country.

In short, they?re the white, middle-class cogs in America?s corporate machine.

Guys like me don?t just wear social masks in social settings. We wear them in professional settings, too. We restrain ourselves. We act as though we care about spreadsheets. We pretend, as a matter of mere survival, that we?re happy we?re working nondescript desk jobs.

Meanwhile, we only have desk jobs because sitting at desks is all the schools ever taught us to do.

I realize George Bush is a symbol of sheer corporate greed for some people. Maybe his background in business says more about him than I?d care to let on here. But after seeing how he acted at the G8, I can?t help but think he only got into business?and then into politics?because business and politics are the only things he?s ever known.

That wasn?t a rare side of Bush we saw at the summit. It was the real Bush?the Bush that Bush pretends not to be, in order to keep his job.

He doesn?t want to be the world?s most powerful person. You can see it in his eyes when he jokes with reporters. He?d rather be off doing stand-up comedy somewhere. And you know what? He would be good at it. He?s not stupid; he?s actually pretty witty.

Witty doesn?t always pay the bills, though. Which is why men like Bush end up where they end up.

So I?m not buying this idea that George Bush is an idiot. Nor do I think we should be embarrassed by his dubious social graces. I?m not even sure we should be embarrassed by his policies anymore. In context, the Iraq War sort of resembles every project I?ve ever taken on in a moment of over-ambition. His secretiveness reminds me of every time I?ve ever said, ?Don?t worry? I?m working on it,? in order to keep my job.

If anything, we shouldn?t be embarrassed by Bush, but by the culture that mass-produces directionless young men just like him every summer. Some are lucky enough to be born with his connections. The rest just scour Monster till they find an employer willing to pay their bills.

Whatever the case, they enter a world that only allows creativity within the contexts of conformity. They don?t have it as bad as starving children in Russia or China (or wherever children are starving these days). But they do, in the words of Peter Gibbons from Office Space, work ?just hard enough not to get fired.? That?s a type of starvation?an oppression of the spirit?all its own.

This doesn?t make them idiots. It just makes them the boys who didn?t ?apply themselves? on report cards?still restless, but technically all grown up.

[Goodghost]

It appears that this is the forum where random blocks of text grabbed off the net are passed on without reference to source or who's responsible for it just so that those who have nothing to do can read something. So here you go; my cuntribution. Have a nice day. (I didn't read them, neither will you but that's what it is all about I suppose).

I do agree with many of the other points on Imperialism and Butter Cookies.

I typed it out word for word! :shock: :shock:

[trocks69]

he keeps us entertained and the rest of the world scared that we have a retared in charge of the most powerfull country in the world.. if you only realized this in our feeble minds you would be really scared..

ok let me say it once again bush is in charge of the USA be scared be very scared..

love Butter Cookies dont say anything bad about them..

bush is not a texan and we do not inbred..he was born in florida...damm people get it right we just elected him govenor of texas. he comes from a state where people have trouble punch vote cards properly...ok some parts of texas there is inbreding but its really close to lousiana and arkansas. they are people who just escaped from those other states..

now bring on the cookies

[Slurms]

he keeps us entertained and the rest of the world scared that we have a retared in charge of the most powerfull country in the world..

Is America still the most powerful country in the world ?

I doubt that...not it's military anyway . China , with north Korea and the muslim world jumping on the bandwagon would have the western world , not just america enslaved in weeks . Arguments can be made that , Economically too, america is on a serious downward spiral ..with the euro , oil crisis , impotency of the american motor/electronic manufacturing sector , huge debt etc etc..If you are American , it's not a time for complacency or resting on laurels , if you want to remain a significant world power in any sense .

Politically , you certainly have no credibility or sway left anyway .

[CiaranM]

This doesn?t make them idiots. It just makes them the boys who didn?t ?apply themselves? on report cards?still restless, but technically all grown up.

yes it f**king does !!!!!

[stegee]

JackyB for president!!

can't be any worse than reagan or bush(es)!!

[trocks69]

i want hilliary clinton back in office again....could you imagine the hell bill clinton would cause with all the women in the white house and all the free time he would have...he would keep the world entertained for years.

i know the usa is sinking thats why am leaving...this rat know when to jump ship..

[Neo]

The G8 didn?t prove Bush is stupid. It basically proved he?s me.

failing to see the distinction here :?

All across America, there are millions of men who can?t make it through an evening without saying something stupid.

So that means that you and George and those millions of men are actually smart? Ok. And reading childrens story books upside down is another proof of intelligence? Good I think I get it now.

[JakeFin]

[Neo]

A dem in the white house and the dems in control of the congress?? Great...let's just take all my money and give it away to every illegal immigrant that can squirm across the border... can you say higher taxes...I knew you could...

erm higher taxes? Just so you know, Bush cut taxes for the rich only.

Woohoo! A Rebublican in a barrell.. fire at will chaps!