visa run to penang
Entry posted by zeusbheld ·
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like the mythical millions of monkeys typing forever who eventually produce the complete works of shakespeare, here's a little evidence that if one types enough, one might actually say something useful to at least one or two people sooner or later. this journal might be useful to non-thais living in thailand on tourist visas and living ah... off their investments, and definitely not working.
i recently did a visa run to penang. it is the place to go for visa runs.
penang, on the other hand, is the home of the semi-mythical Three Entry Visa. no, it doesn't mean that immigration officials penetrate you in three orifices, it means you can come and go three times on a tourist visa. they don't give out cool visas like this in places like singapore or new york, and i've heard rumors that they'll abuse you in hong kong if you go there.
penang was a snap though.
i contacted this guy named 'jim' who runs a guest house. he was recommended by a friend, who said jim was quite mad. but the friend who recommended jim is far madder, jim's just a bit energetic, but i saw no evidence of madness whatsoever.
air asia, aka khee nok airlines, only cost about 5,000 including tax. however, some things to be aware of: khee nok airlines keep the prices low by not spending money on luxury items like in-flight snacks and aviation fuel. you can buy snacks from the in-flight 7-11, which resembles the traditional airline serving cart except for the cash register. and you might be asked to pony up gas money. i heard a nasty rumor that they even bill you for checking ANY bags. you don't need to check bags, though, you'll only stay in penang about 3 days.
i flew in on the tuesday afternoon flight, arriving at penang 5pm (different time zone, one hour ahead of bkk there). taxi from the airport is 38 ringit prepaid, which is about 380 baht.
i chose to stay at jim's place, he has a little guest house with about 5 rooms. these rooms are clean but VERY basic and you share bathroom and shower. there is one aircon room, it is 30 ringit (about 300 baht) and the non-aircon is 20 ringit. non-aircon... in penang... even the elegant and purest zeus b held is not THAT khee nok.
you give jim 375 ringit (about 3,750 baht), he takes your passport, it disappears, you chill in penang until thursday. at 2 pm on thursday your passport comes back with a visa, and at 3 you take a taxi to the airport (30 ringit) for the 5 oclock flight back to bkk. 300 of the 375 ringit fee goes to the consulate, by the way. i found this very reasonable charge for the service. most likely you can go to the thai consolate yourself and get the same results in the same time, but a) i'm lazy, and 
even if jim and his people didnt bribe a few consulate types to make things easier, i don't mind that the consolate people see someone they do business with regularly and i stay anonymous. in my experience, consulate people everywhere (not just thai consulate) are well trained in the art of saying "no."
georgetown, where jim's guesthouse and cafe is located, is a sleepy little colonial town. when frances light founded it, he intended it to be a trade hub like singapore turned out to be. except for the heroin trade, historically singapore made the cut, penang didn't. there are some things to do in your short stay on penang island, such as enjoy the view from atop penang hill, see the waterfall in the botanical garden, or chill on the beach at ferrenghi (sp?). i did none of these. i chose to focus on the basics, walking, eating and drinking. there are some good indian restaurants in penang. the worst indian food i had there was better than the best i've had in bangkok. malaysian food is pretty good, i had some exquisite lamb curry. their coffee is just as sweet as thai coffee, the beans are fried instead of roasted, and there are coffee shops everywhere. most importantly, they brew a bastard scion of guinness in malaysia. it's not as good as the real thing but at 8 ringit a mug, i'll live with that. even brought a can home with me (which is of course long gone).
there are an odd collection of traveller types floating around town--people who ended up in penang and never leave, sex tourists from bangkok on visa runs, and backpackers. lots and lots of backpackers. for you single gentlemen, i heard a rumor in my bible study class that backpacker girls are easy. i suspect some truth to this, as i witnessed one hook up with an indian guy (much younger and better looking than the average TF male, however) who worked at jim's cafe.
the natives of georgetown are a curious lot too. it's a mix of indian, malay and chinese, mostly. the chinese families keep elaborate clan houses (more temples than houses, i think) unlike in bangkok where i haven't seen any. chinatown coffee shops are the best for coffee. there are tons of muslims and none of the muslims i talked to seemed to give a **** that i was an american infidel and probably ought to be destroyed. one might even come to believe, based on things like meeting actual people, that islamism is a separate, radical element from mainstream islam, but i'lll save the political rant for another time. an ancient muslim guy lured me into a conversation in order to attempt to convince me that pop music was messing up kids' minds, and i should focus more on classical music, and spread the word. never shoulda let him know i like indian classical music 
all in all, a much more pleasant visa experience than the cambodia border bus. the cambodia bus costs only 2,000 baht, but if you've been here in thailand a while you have zip zip zero chance of them issiuing you a visa so you have to do it every month. and the beauty of the airplane is that people fly for reasons other than visa runs sometimes. on the bus, 10 times out of 9 you'll be sitting next to a chatty sex tourists who insists on telling you about what an excellent bargirl he lives with (like a proud grandparent, almost) whereas on the plane, the person next to you might not even BE a sex tourist. and the ones that are there are sulking after having to pay extra to check in their golf clubs (remember, this is khee nok airlines, we keep the price down by charging you for every little thing).
i do recommend khee nok airlines, though, with the caveats mentioned above.
and highly recommend jim's visa service--it can all be done without a brain, very important to someone like me. many of the hotels, even the nicer ones, advertise thailand visa services, so it's common practice there. and, as i said, you can probably just waltz into the consulate yourself and get a visa (and it must be a waltz, no other dance allowed).
hope this info will be useful to someone, he says, pretending to care, knowing full well the reason he wrote this journal was just in case he forgets everything before his next visa run.
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