KIDS IN GRADE SCHOOL THINK FAST (very funny)
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TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go
Slow."
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TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math
multiplication on the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!
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TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile?"
JOHN: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that"s wrong
JOHN: Maybe it"s wrong, but you asked me how I
spell it!
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TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
SARAH: Yesterday you said it"s H to O!
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TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North
America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered
America ?
CLASS: George!
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TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have
today that we didn"t have ten years ago.
WILLIE: Me!
______________
TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I"m a lot closer to the ground than
you are.
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TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with
"I."
ELLEN: I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the
alphabet."
_____________
TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of
COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on
the
same day, same time."
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TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down
his father"s cherry tree, but also admitted doing
it. Now do you know why his father didn"t punish
him?"
JOHNNY: "Because George still had the ax in his
hand."
______________
TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say
prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don"t have to, my Mom is a good
cook.
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TEACHER: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is
exactly the same as your brother"s. Did you copy
his?
DESMOND: No! , teacher, it"s the same dog!
______________
TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on
talking when people are no longer interested?
PUPIL: A teacher.
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