It was a bad day for me. Today I went to the hospital to visit my mother (read my former journal). She's now hospitalized after she was not able to live alone anymore. My sisters did their best by helping her at her flat, cleaning, doing the laundry and ironing .......... etc. But last week there was a point there should be somebody constantly  with her, day and night, because we feared that she would do crazy things (like making eggs on the electric plate without using a cooking pan, she really did). And we were afraid she'd do something when nobody was there and hurt herself or worse. And like we all still work the only option was bringing her to the hospital for further examination.The doctors said there that she was physical good, despite the cancer who's in her chest and in her abdomen. They say it's not really malign and those tumors don't not grow really fast by older people and she'll healthy physically for years to come. The problem is that she's dementing quite fast. They also discovered two little and quite recent brainstrokes, which would have fastened the proces. I went there again this evening after work. My sister had to leave to take care for her childern (she was very emotional upset). I went with my mother to the cafetaria to drink a coffee and later went back to the room and put butter and cheese on her bread and was watching and encourage her to eat. She always eat good if there's someone of us with her. But it was nearly not possible to have a reasonable conversation with her. She talked about a train and later she start dressing herself to leave with me or asking me if I stayed sleeping there. I was upset when leaving and more close to crying than a laugh (even some things she says are funny). They told us that we should look for an elder home where they can take proper care for her.  I realise now even more how much she meant and means for us all. She brought 14 children on this earth and it feels like injustice she has to end her life like this.At this moment I realise that my mother is so special in my life. That I love her so much and I appreciate even more what she has done for me and all my sibblings. Love your mother, she's the most precious thing in your life. 

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I can't imagine how that feels. I do love my mother and father more than anyone in this world, and couldn't imagine if something bad like this happened to them.

Thanks for sharing this...helps for us to put things in perspective.

I'm lucky my mother lives with me and she's healthy for her age (72yo). I wish your mother all the best and the symtomps just gradually decline.

sorry to hear that mate , if there is something i can do dont worry and just ask , im only a call away and i can be there very soon if you want stay strong

Sad to think of but there are more of beatiful memories to cheer u up. I dont know if I'll be that strong when I have to face such situation. When my granda still with me, before she left us she was suffered from illness for years I was young but it was a painful.

If I can choose I dont wanna live till that old, I dont wanna see both myself or my beloved ones suffer from anything. I wanna die at my 60.

Eric...sorry to hear...

i know...it feels very bad and hurts sooo much...

Sure..nobody like to lose...

Mother are the best in the world!

I now it sounds stupid...

but..anybody have to take his own choice...

and i hope your mother can do it and get back again...

or not gonna suffer..

yeah....it's very pity...

but we are all going the same way.....

early ot later..

sure...anybody trying our best...

like i always say...

enjoy every min...coz it's later as you think..

best wishes to your great mother and family..

Take care..-

i wish she get well soon i know how you feel cheeeer ka

Thanks for you comments ........ I know and I try to enjoy still every moment with her. This evening she was very bad, but other days she's still clear and can follow for a while a conversation and is ashamed that everyone has to take care of her, but then I say: 'mum, you took care of us all all your life, now it's our turn'.

so difficult to give a comment. this is the live !!!!!

i think evryone of us who reads your journal, we hope that it will solse in better way.

i only know that she will get well with your care and support

That's the best way...to try:)

I was just thinking if one day, something bad happen to my mom and dad.....what am i gonna do....how can I live without them...then i started to cried

I'm sorry to hear about your mother ka..........hope things are going better, keep smiling na ka

I feel you. My mother is in hospital right now, and not doing well at all. I'm not sure what is going to happen, and its so hard to deal with. I'm trying to be strong as I can, but when I see her like that it's tough. I will pray for your mother. Take care.

All the best Eric,facts and happenings in life can be sad but I guess we have all got to go through

these things and makes you wonder what will happen to us and the pressure is on some one else

to make descisions on how to handle an ageing mum or dad.

Sometimes life is not fair.

I hope she gets better.

God bless you Eric that you realize before she is gone !!

Gold Bless her. Spend your time with her, do your best then you won't feel regret when she is away. All the best.

Thanks to you all for your support ....... I appreciate it very much.

Give all your time to her...hope she gets better.