My Sweet Angela....
Entry posted by English_Bob ·
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Well, it's been a while.
Angela hasn't sent me any messages for some time now... Or perhaps she has, but I didn't see them for all the BOOST Sex, Swingers Now!, **** Book and Full Cheating Wives messages in my junk mail box...
Incidentally, I almost opened that last one out of sheer curiosity. I can understand wanting to meet cheating wives, but why the emphasis on 'Full'? Is that a site for guys who are too stingy to pay for lunch before they **** someone else's wife?
Anyway, it's been so long that perhaps the 11 or 12 people left reading Thailand Friends blogs have forgotten who Angela is. Let me refresh your memories...
Angela is a sweet Nigerian girl who has had a terrible life... For the past 3-4 years she has been stuck in a refugee camp in Darfur or Dakar - I can't remember which. Obviously the stress of being in such a terrible place has affected her memory as she frequently adds new information to her plight that I wasn't aware of before.... spoiler alert.... In this latest email she now has an abusive husband.
It must be a terrible shock to her as previously she lived the life of Reilly as her Daddy was a financial adviser to a war criminal. Before his untimely death he was able to stash 5 million dollars away for her benefit.
Since then she has been trapped in a hellhole, trying to give 10% of that money to English Bob. Here is her latest predicament....
Hello Dear,
How are you today? i guess you are doing great, it saddens me to find out that the money i left for you is still pending and you have not received it, am very sorry about that but not to worry as everything will be okay now because I had problems with my husband as we have been having serious marital problems and he never let me see my mail or let me out of the house, so I have been living in slavery.
The man i married have been abusing me badly, he hits me after taking drugs and alcohol, he and his friend tried to rape me on several occasions I had to spend several weeks in the hospital for treatment, he spent about $ 600,000 Six hundred thousand dollars of my money uselessly to sponsor some drug addicts he calls his friends, so I had to get a lawyer to stop him from taking the money anymore, yet I have about $4.3M USD left after all he did now the money is in Bond in the bank in UK with the help of this lawyer also I have been able to obtain a divorce from him, so we no longer live together, as he has treated me so badly since I married him.
I have also discussed with the lawyer to help me transfer that money to you so he made so many suggestions and we came to an agreement so I decided on a better and easier means to transfer the money to you,I have appointed the lawyer who will ensure that the money is shipped to you via diplomatic means. He has offered to pay $15,000 usd for the shipment to your destination and would monitor the delivery. As we both have agreed, 10% of the money will be accrued to him as legal service charge when the money gets to you for offering to pay for the shipment. It will be delivered to you by a diplomat also known as deliveryman, take note that instead of through bank, the money will now be shipped in a box officially known as diplomatic baggage. The content has been registered as diplomatic materials instead of cash, the company in possession of the baggage is same company that will ship it, it is a security company. The company is affiliated with UPS Facility
Storehouse in all airports of the world.
See details below:
Firm: Annex Clifford Law Firm, Barristers & Solicitors
Name: Peter Taylor Esq.
Phone: +44 792 891 9451
Address: 50 Charring Road, LONDON ENGLAND W1D 7DY, U.K
Email: [email protected]
Send him an Email immediately and keep me updated, henceforth all correspondence comes and goes through this UK attorney as he is more competent to handle this issue without problems
Hope to hear from you soon as we need to get things done now since this is the best means and assure you that we can conclude this within one week
Thank you
With Love,
Angela.
Heeeeeyyyy Angie Baby!!!
It's been a coon's age since you last wrote to me. Lol don't take that personal... I Googled it. It's about raccoons who supposedly live a long time... But actually they don't. But in all seriousness, they probably live longer than most Darfurese, so it's a bit sad, when you think about it.
And you are correct.... I AM doing great, despite not having access to your 4.3 million dollars. But as you no doubt don't recall, 4.3 million is chump change to me... I earn 2 or 3 times that on a monthly basis.
At least I used to... my life has taken a tragic turn for the worse and I'm not doing great at all... I think I only wrote that to show off a bit.
Whenever I feel down, I think of people worse off than myself, such as your poor husband struggling with his drug addiction and I think to myself, "How terrible it must be to be addicted to drugs and not get the good stuff." Personally that has never been an issue for me as I know plenty of people prepared to sell me good quality drugs at low low prices.
It's also sad to hear he has been beating you... I stopped beating my wife several years ago. I remember the night very well, I came home from a night out and found dog poo in one of my slippers. I was incensed. Even more so, since we don't have a dog.
I took out my biggest, strongest wife-beating stick and began raining blows down upon her. And then a bright shining light appeared and a vision of Jesus revealed itself to me. Jesus is a guy I sometimes buy crack from... And Jesus spake to me and sayeth, "Yo homs... I tink you killed da *****. she ain't breavin' or nuttin'" I'm not sure where Jesus comes from, but judging by the accent I just wrote, I would say Mexico, the Carribean and Detroit.
I'm happy to say, I have never laid a finger on her since that day. In fact, once we'd left her in a ditch covered in leaves, I've barely given her a second thought until your email arrived today... God Dammit woman!!! Why'd you have to remind me? God the screaming! I can still hear it in my head now.
But let's get serious for a minute... You say your husband and friends can get drugs. Do you think they'd be interested in doing some business? Nothing major, just a couple of kilos a month. I know a woman with Down's Syndrome... She'd carry anything through customs. And who's gonna suspect a retard? The plan's perfect, my sweet Angela. You could set up the details on your end, and I'd send your cut back through Western Union... I promise you solemnly... On my late wife's shallow grave.
I notice you have taken the advice of a lawyer.... Those scum-sucking leaches will bleed you and your gang dry. For God's sake be careful! As I recall, the last time we spoke, I was in for about $2 million in cash. That figure seems to have been revised downwards to a poxy 10%. $430,000? You'd better think again, Baby... I don't get out of bed for that. I bet that dirty, robbing bastard the lawyer stole my share! What's his name? Peter Taylor Esq? Yeah? What the **** does ESQ mean? Extra.... Secretive... Qu... Qu.. Queen?
That's it... I bet he's an extra secretive queen. You'd better tell him I want my $2 million and fast or I'm going to send my friend after him... Have you heard of Vincent Vega? You bet your ass you have... He's one bad dude. If I send him out after Peter 'Gaylord' Taylor Esq, there's no Tora Bora mountain shithole deep enough to hide in. Remember what happened to Obama Bin Laden? Yeah? Well that was Vincent's work... Pretty sweet, huh?
But that's enough fun and games, my darling. Let me know when you get this email. Please include the secret code.... if you write 'Dear Bob' or 'Dear Dave' at the beginning of the email, I will know you want to send it to me, and not a hundred other suckers.
All my credibility
Bob (or Dave)
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