There has been several articles in the press lately in reguard to the China Olympics. We have heard or seen most of them. However the latest on is interesting.China has stated that Australians, will not be able to bring (their own) food to China. It is unclear at this stage if this also includes competitors. In light of this, one, has to ask the question."Is China really READY to hold the Olympics" ???I am going to leave this one alone ...... lolI think somve very interesting stories are going t
....................everywhere but no water, no crop
RICE grower Robin Crawford takes little comfort from soaring world rice prices.
Robin Crawford from Moulamein inspects the arid rice paddies that have not had water for two years. Picture: Graham Crouch
She won't be able to cash in until the drought eases and there is significantly more water in the dams that supply her water-intensive crop. "We had no rice this year and no rice last year either. It is not good. Rice is about 60 p
Where do GIRLS find a sensitive husband like this?? lolA couple of weeks ago, I was sitting on the patio, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn.
Cheryl from next door saw us and was so upset that she came over and yelled at me...."You lazy prick! Sitting there drinking beer while your poor wife pushes that ancient lawn mower around! Get up off your arse and give her a break!"
I thought "****! ... Women!" Took another swig from my stubby, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted
A woman goes into a store to buy a fishing rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. The salesman is standing there, wearing dark glasses. She says, Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?' He says, 'Madam, I'm completely blind; but, if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.' She doesn't believe him but drops it on
Went into the city and picked up Tawan & Waza from their hotelReady for an afternoon site seeingTawan wants to check her cameraWe spotted a nice old Chev in AltonaThen we saw 3 more in Williamstown, so I blocked the traffic to take a quick photo. See the traffic in my rear view mirror, lol.From there we went to Port Phillip near Point CookIt was cool and windy so a short time later I took them to their Hotel to rest and freshen up for dinner. The Venue was........Wallace arrived first, He h
An attractive blonde from Dublin arrived and bet twenty-thousand pounds
on a single roll of the dice.
She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm
completely nude'.
With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and Yelled,
'Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!'
As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed... 'YES!
YES! I WON, I WON!'
She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her
clothes and quickl
Two deaf people get married and during the first
week of marriage they find that they are unable to
communicate in the bedroom with the lights out since
they can't see each other signing, or lips to lip-read.
After several nights of fumbling around and many
misunderstandings, the wife figures out a solution.
She writes, 'Honey, why don't we agree on some
simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to
have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left
breast one time.
While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, and asked, 'What's your hurry?'
To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'
'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'
I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.
The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum
Every February 14th men get the chance to display their fondness for their wives and/or girlfriends by showering them with gifts, flowers, dinners, shows and any other baubles that women find romantic.
Secretly, guys feel left out. That's right... very left out.
There's no special holiday for the ladies to show their appreciation for the men in their life. Men as a whole are either too proud or just too embarrassed to admit it. That's why a new national holiday has been created.
These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around the USA.......................... 1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."
2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They stretch after awhile."
3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."
4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed
Here are some more photos that came in over night from persons who wish at this stage to be un named (Wallace) lolThis is the view as you arrive in Federation SquareHmmmm just a few of the people here.Remember my lunch...........And this is what happened to it.....but...............When I asked what happened to it, Steve said a guy snached it away, and ran that way................. heheheheheI did a quick search, and Yep it had gone alright. I cound not work out why they left the dirty plate beh
Went into Federation Square today to enjoy the Thailand Festival. It was packed with so many people, just like Bangkok lol. Tha first thing I had to do was taste the food. Then it was on to a few Singha's with Cosmo Luckyphil Dave40 Wallace Sreve and a few others. We were very lucky, as there was a group of Thai girls at the next table and being Good Australians, we be friended them. This lady was very sweet and enjoyed the Thai band that was playing With her partners in Crime...............
HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE.
George Phillips of Gold Coast, Australia was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. ( Boy does this sound familiar! )
George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.
He phoned the police, who asked 'Is someone in your house?' and he said 'no'. Then they said that a
Short
and sweet...
I rear-ended a car this morning, on the way to work .....
I tell you, I knew right then and there that it was going to be a
REALLY bad day! The driver got out of the other car, and wouldn't you
know it!
He was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said, 'I'm NOT ******* happy!'
So I said, 'Which ******* one are you then?'
That's how the fight started. ...
A woman sitting in an Adelaide Pub suddenly began to cough .
After a few seconds it became apparent that she was in real distress, and two locals, Bluey and Wazza sitting at the next table turned to look at her.
"Can ya swaller? " asked Bluey.
The woman signalled 'No!' desperately shaking her head.
"Kin ya breathe?" asked Wazza. The woman shook her head 'No!'
With that, Bluey walked behind her, lifted up the back of her dress, yanked down her knicker and ran his tongue up and down the