Jump to content

Blog iBatch

A blog by iBatch in General

  • entries
    114
  • comments
    0
  • views
    2358

Added more Jokes! Hahahahah ooi yoi hahaha Help me i cant stop laughing!

iBatch

Entry posted by iBatch ·

272 views

 Share

Confusing Chinese Names

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

                             

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!

 ..................

An old man goes into a drug store to buy some Viagra

 'Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?'    

  "I can cut them for you," said Dan the pharmacist, 

 "but a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection. '   

  "I am 96" said the old man, "I don't want an erection.

                  I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't pee on my slippers."

....................

Two Ladies Talking in Heaven

  

          1st woman:    Hi!  My name is Wanda.

 

          2nd woman:   Hi!  I'm Sylvia. How'd you die?

  

         1st woman:    I froze to death

 

         2nd woman:   How horrible!

  

          1st woman:    It wasn't so bad.  After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death.  What about you?

  

          2nd woman:   I died of a massive heart attack.  I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.  But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

  

          1st woman:    So, what happened?

  

          2nd woman:   I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.  I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement.  Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds.  I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

  

          1st woman:    Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.

  

PRICELESS!

 

 

 Share

0 Comments

Recommended Comments

iBatch

Confusing Chinese Names

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

                             

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!

 ..................

An old man goes into a drug store to buy some Viagra

 'Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?'    

  "I can cut them for you," said Dan the pharmacist, 

 "but a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection. '   

  "I am 96" said the old man, "I don't want an erection.

                  I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't pee on my slippers."

....................

Two Ladies Talking in Heaven

  

          1st woman:    Hi!  My name is Wanda.

 

          2nd woman:   Hi!  I'm Sylvia. How'd you die?

  

         1st woman:    I froze to death

 

         2nd woman:   How horrible!

  

          1st woman:    It wasn't so bad.  After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death.  What about you?

  

          2nd woman:   I died of a massive heart attack.  I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.  But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

  

          1st woman:    So, what happened?

  

          2nd woman:   I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.  I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement.  Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds.  I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

  

          1st woman:    Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.

  

PRICELESS!

 

 

Link to comment
PeterH61

There's a flaw inb the first story, there aren't any telephones in China - because there are so mant Wings and so many Wongs that someone might wing the wong number

Link to comment
Neutron

It's not just Asians who have funny names.

I used to work with my johnson.

I mean My Johnson. Actually she spelled her name "Maj", but it was Norwegian and pronounced "my".

And if you're Thai, and wondering what a "johnson" is, you probably don't have one.

Link to comment
PeterH61

As for funny names, when I was working (I retired in 2006) a colleague in oyr Madrid office had half Spanish and half English parentage. His mother insisted on naming him after her father Juan (pronounced "hwan" in Spanish), not realising the combination with his family name of Kerr would sound very funny to English ears "Hwan Kerr" (wanker) On his first visit to London I met him at the airport and advised him to translate his first name to the English equivalent of John while he was in the UK

Link to comment

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...