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bigKus

Tell your jokes ..!

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A VIRGIN MAN

Girls A, B, C, D were sitting In the table of a kinda 'dining beauties' one fine night..

Girl A.. " I just got back from holiday vacation with my boyfriend, It's our first time stay over night together'' ...she blushed..

Girl B, C, D.."Oh yeah ?? That must be first time that you.... with him?" they asked almost same time with same question.

Girl A.."Yes, he's such a lovely boy, gentle , nice , kind and ..err...virgin"

Girl B, C, D.."Virgin!! How did you know he's virgin?" again..same question same time.

Girl A..Blushed.."Of course, I know. Because his 'thing' still in plastic wrapped" blushed..blushed.. :oops: :oops:

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hahahah... what a real funny joke, sushi..

I still love them anyway, men..lolz :lol: :twisted:

So what did you finally want to say? :wink:

(my listening particle playing up)

What i really want to say was even their ironing brain / listening particle are very very tiny i still love men, ( not turn to be a ***** ), get it ? :twisted:

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hahahah... what a real funny joke, sushi..

I still love them anyway, men..lolz :lol: :twisted:

So what did you finally want to say? :wink:

(my listening particle playing up)

What i really want to say was even their ironing brain / listening particle are very very tiny i still love men, ( not turn to be a ***** ), get it ? :twisted:

Yesss - As long as the Main Attraction isn't tiny I always say! :lol:

Yesss - As long as the Main part of their brain not turn them to the idoits that would be fine.. :x

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Scotsman, Englishman and and Irishman walk into a bar...

The barman says "Oi is this some kind of a joke'!!!!

<end>

Now half of you wont get that and the other half wont want to....

:roll: too bad.. i got it.. :lol:

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Two nuns are driving along a quiet road late on night, suddenly a vampire jumps onto the bonnet of their car...

The nun whos driving says to the other one 'Quick....show him your cross'!!!

So the other nun leans out of the window and shouts 'OI....get of our ******* car ya bastard'!!!

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An egg was flying past a house when it saw 3 elephants sitting on the roof of the house. The elephants shouted : hey egg, come join us, then we can play cards. No, said the egg, I don't have time, I'm flying to the hair saloon.

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An egg was flying past a house when it saw 3 elephants sitting on the roof of the house. The elephants shouted : hey egg, come join us, then we can play cards. No, said the egg, because elephants cannot play cards.

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Now half of you wont get that and the other half wont want to....

Rangers will win the Scottish Premiership next season ...

5555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

No wonder Eddie cant stand you!!

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A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of OAPs when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.

She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

When she is about to hand him another batch again, he asks her: "Why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?"

"We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.

We just love the chocolate around them."

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A black family desperately wanted to become white so they went to the magician in their village. After reading the intestines of a chicken, the magician told them : next week, when it's full moon, you will have to swim to the other side of the river. When you reach the other side, you will be white!

So, the next week, when it was full moon the man, wife and their two kids went to the river. Let me go first said the man so I can see if this really works. He jumped into the river and swam to the other side. When he arrived there, he was white indeed! He shouted to his wife : come on, your turn now! So the wife jumped into the water and swam also to the other side. When she got out of the river, she was also white!

They were so happy and shouted to their kids that they had to come now. So both kids jumped into the water and started swimming to the other side. But when they were in the middle of the river a bunch of crocodiles arrived and ate both kids. When the mother saw this she started crying hysterically but the father put his hand on her shoulder and told her : don't cry women, those were only blacks!

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a coach load of Japanese tourists was robbed outside Mambo carbaret in Bangkok ..... police have 5,000 photos of the suspects !!!!

or alternatively ..... a TF party in Gullivers was robbed police have 5,000,000,000,000 photos of the suspects !!!! :twisted: :twisted:

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ospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital when, during her tour, she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.

"Oh my GOD!" screamed the woman, "That's disgraceful! Why is he doing that?"

The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, "I'm very sorry that you were exposed to that situation, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn't do that at least 5 times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture."

"Oh well, in that case, I guess it's OK," commented the woman. In the very next room, a male patient was lying in bed and it was obvious that a nurse was performing orally on him. Again, the woman screamed, "Oh my GOD!! How can THAT be justified?"

The doctor spoke very calmly and replied, "Same illness, better health plan."

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A woman came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman.

With superhuman strength borne of fury, she dragged her husband down the stairs to the garage and put his philandering member in a vise. She then secured it tightly and removed the handle. Next she picked up a hacksaw.

The husband terrified, screamed, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to......to....cut it off are you?!"

The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, said, "Nope. You are. I'm going to set the garage on fire."

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Your joke is real funny.. thanks..

Here joke for Lung Mike.. (repost) celebrate his bd..

One fine day Lung Mike ( uncle Mike ), 63 years old gentleman, walking into health clinic to get his physical checked which he regularly do every six months.

After checking verything done, Doctor told him to sit at his desk and had some questions with him ....

Doctor :: " Lung Mike, since you have doing your physical check with me many years till now you are 63 years old already I found nothing wrong in your body very healthy you are, may I ask that what was caused your father died ? "

Lung Mike :: "My father is now 83 years old, still alive and also very healthy i just got back from golfing with him last weekend"

Doctor :: "Oh yeah ?? that is really good for him. What about your grandfather ? What was caused him die ? "

Lung Mike :: "My grandfather is now 103 years old, still alive and also very healthy he just got married again with 20 years old girl last month"

Doctor :: "Wow really ??.. that was not good for him you should not let him do that he is too old"

Lung Mike :: " Yes, i know but he has to, that girl got pregnant "

:lol:

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