Dave40 Posted August 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 24, 2009 Go England.....unlucky Aussies...shame to see ricky bleeding from the mouth....but really who'da thunk it....unseasonal brilliant sunshine aiding the Poms.... Thanks for the sporting banter Sir Dave No worries we will do it all again in 18 months time!!! cheers!!! (And hopefully we will win) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAV Posted August 24, 2009 Report Share Posted August 24, 2009 I heard a little "WISPER" that a certain country, far far away from England, is going to "Hang draw and 1/4" certain selectors :wink: :wink: Kepp your eyes open for more ....................... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted August 28, 2009 Report Share Posted August 28, 2009 and now that minor battle is out the way, bring on Scotland vs Australia next weekend; let's whup those Aussies. (more medication please) I told the boys to go easy on the Scots, they are a great bunch of blokes!!! well they obviously f*cking ignored you!!! anyone got a calculator?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted August 28, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 28, 2009 and now that minor battle is out the way, bring on Scotland vs Australia next weekend; let's whup those Aussies. (more medication please) I told the boys to go easy on the Scots, they are a great bunch of blokes!!! well they obviously f*cking ignored you!!! anyone got a calculator?? Ease up young fella, there are still many overs to be bowled!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted August 28, 2009 Report Share Posted August 28, 2009 and now that minor battle is out the way, bring on Scotland vs Australia next weekend; let's whup those Aussies. (more medication please) I told the boys to go easy on the Scots, they are a great bunch of blokes!!! well they obviously f*cking ignored you!!! anyone got a calculator?? Ease up young fella, there are still many overs to be bowled!! whats happened ? im just back home and cant be arsed typing www.sportinglife.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted August 28, 2009 Report Share Posted August 28, 2009 and now that minor battle is out the way, bring on Scotland vs Australia next weekend; let's whup those Aussies. (more medication please) I told the boys to go easy on the Scots, they are a great bunch of blokes!!! well they obviously f*cking ignored you!!! anyone got a calculator?? Ease up young fella, there are still many overs to be bowled!! whats happened ? im just back home and cant be arsed typing www.sportinglife.com Aus 345 all out (hussey 111) Scot 34 for 0 - need 312 to win Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LakeGeneve Posted September 20, 2009 Report Share Posted September 20, 2009 ^Did Scotland win? OMG, England may finally win a one day game, the final game in the series, against the Aussies!!! (A belated congrats on the Ashes win to the Poms :oops: ). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted September 20, 2009 Report Share Posted September 20, 2009 ^Did Scotland win? and the award for stupid question of the year goes to... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky_house Posted December 10, 2010 Report Share Posted December 10, 2010 Received this by email today: :-) --- A LADY WALKED INTO A POLICE STATION. THE DESK SERGEANT SAID "CAN I HELP YOU?" "YES" SHE SAID, "I'D LIKE TO REPORT A CASE OF SEXUAL ASSAULT". "WHERE DID IT HAPPEN?" THE SERGEANT ASKED. "IN THE PARK JUST DOWN THE ROAD" SHE REPLIED. "CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT HAPPENED?" "YES, I WAS WALKING ALONG THE FOOTPATH IN THE PARK NEAR THE TREES WHEN A MAN JUMPED OUT OF THE BUSHES AND DRAGGED ME IN THERE, REMOVED MY UNDERWEAR. THEN HE DROPPED HIS PANTS TO HIS KNEES AND HAD HIS WAY WITH ME". "COULD YOU GIVE ME A DESCRIPTION OF HIM?" "YES, HE WAS WEARING WHITE SHOES, LONG WHITE TROUSERS, A WHITE SHIRT AND HE HAD THESE TWO BIG LONG PADS FROM HIS FEET UP TO AND OVER HIS KNEES, ONE ON EACH LEG". "SOUNDS TO ME LIKE HE WAS A CRICKETER, MOST ROBABLY A BATSMAN", SAID THE SERGEANT. "YES", SAID THE LADY, "HE WAS AN AUSSIE CRICKETER". "THAT'S VERY OBSERVANT", SAID THE SERGEANT, "YOU WORKED THAT OUT FROM HIS ACCENT?" "NO", SHE REPLIED, "I WORKED IT OUT BECAUSE HE WASN'T IN FOR VERY LONG". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted December 10, 2010 Report Share Posted December 10, 2010 Received this by email today: :-)--- A LADY WALKED INTO A POLICE STATION. THE DESK SERGEANT SAID "CAN I HELP YOU?" "YES" SHE SAID, "I'D LIKE TO REPORT A CASE OF SEXUAL ASSAULT". "WHERE DID IT HAPPEN?" THE SERGEANT ASKED. "IN THE PARK JUST DOWN THE ROAD" SHE REPLIED. "CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT HAPPENED?" "YES, I WAS WALKING ALONG THE FOOTPATH IN THE PARK NEAR THE TREES WHEN A MAN JUMPED OUT OF THE BUSHES AND DRAGGED ME IN THERE, REMOVED MY UNDERWEAR. THEN HE DROPPED HIS PANTS TO HIS KNEES AND HAD HIS WAY WITH ME". "COULD YOU GIVE ME A DESCRIPTION OF HIM?" "YES, HE WAS WEARING WHITE SHOES, LONG WHITE TROUSERS, A WHITE SHIRT AND HE HAD THESE TWO BIG LONG PADS FROM HIS FEET UP TO AND OVER HIS KNEES, ONE ON EACH LEG". "SOUNDS TO ME LIKE HE WAS A CRICKETER, MOST ROBABLY A BATSMAN", SAID THE SERGEANT. "YES", SAID THE LADY, "HE WAS AN AUSSIE CRICKETER". "THAT'S VERY OBSERVANT", SAID THE SERGEANT, "YOU WORKED THAT OUT FROM HIS ACCENT?" "NO", SHE REPLIED, "I WORKED IT OUT BECAUSE HE WASN'T IN FOR VERY LONG". :twisted: Did he refer it to the 3rd umpire before he accepted he was actually out tho??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted December 10, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 10, 2010 Received this by email today: :-)--- A LADY WALKED INTO A POLICE STATION. THE DESK SERGEANT SAID "CAN I HELP YOU?" "YES" SHE SAID, "I'D LIKE TO REPORT A CASE OF SEXUAL ASSAULT". "WHERE DID IT HAPPEN?" THE SERGEANT ASKED. "IN THE PARK JUST DOWN THE ROAD" SHE REPLIED. "CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT HAPPENED?" "YES, I WAS WALKING ALONG THE FOOTPATH IN THE PARK NEAR THE TREES WHEN A MAN JUMPED OUT OF THE BUSHES AND DRAGGED ME IN THERE, REMOVED MY UNDERWEAR. THEN HE DROPPED HIS PANTS TO HIS KNEES AND HAD HIS WAY WITH ME". "COULD YOU GIVE ME A DESCRIPTION OF HIM?" "YES, HE WAS WEARING WHITE SHOES, LONG WHITE TROUSERS, A WHITE SHIRT AND HE HAD THESE TWO BIG LONG PADS FROM HIS FEET UP TO AND OVER HIS KNEES, ONE ON EACH LEG". "SOUNDS TO ME LIKE HE WAS A CRICKETER, MOST ROBABLY A BATSMAN", SAID THE SERGEANT. "YES", SAID THE LADY, "HE WAS AN AUSSIE CRICKETER". "THAT'S VERY OBSERVANT", SAID THE SERGEANT, "YOU WORKED THAT OUT FROM HIS ACCENT?" "NO", SHE REPLIED, "I WORKED IT OUT BECAUSE HE WASN'T IN FOR VERY LONG". :twisted: Did he refer it to the 3rd umpire before he accepted he was actually out tho??? Geez that English bandwagon is getting bigger !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Warnie where are you!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 11, 2010 Report Share Posted December 11, 2010 Friday 10 December 2010 by Doug Furlong and Patrick Perring Panicking Aussies urge a call up for Sir Don Bradman to the Ashes Squad Desperate Australian cricket fans have called for Don Bradman to be rushed into the ashes squad ready for the Perth test following the inning defeat at Adelaide. Bradman was an Australian cricketer, widely acknowledged as the greatest batsman of all time with a career Test batting average of 99.94 which has been claimed to be statistically the greatest achievement in any major sport. Dingo Johnson cricket correspondent from the Sydney Herald said, “The fact that the Don has been dead for nine years and would be 101 were he alive should not stop him playing for the baggy greens and showing the Poms what the game is all about.†“Death may be permanent, but so is class.†Cricket fans leaving the Adelaide test said, “While the Dons lifeless corpse may not be the most agile of players he will certainly be more animated than Marcus North, and will certainly add some gravitas to the team.†“Also, he can certainly be relied upon not to show fear if we put him at silly mid on. Australian Test Team Spinner Graham Swann, speaking on behalf of the England squad said, “This move shows that the Aussies are panicking.†“Sure, we would all like the opportunity to face such a legend, although we may have to consider the whether Bradman will be allowed a runner when he comes into bat, given he’s been dead for nine years.†Brisbane cricket fan Ross Heywood has established a website devoted to raising funds to entice Bradman to make himself available and shops have reported increases in sales of Ouija boards and shovels over the last few days. Meanwhile Kevin Pieterson has been fined $150 by the Australian authorities for scoring at a run rate far faster than is permitted in Australia. Spokesperson Bruce Gooday confirmed, “Pieterson was scoring at a strike rate of 73.30%, a strike rate way above the permitted 55% for Australia. He was scoring at a ridiculous speed. It was just not cricket.†“The $150 fine is disproportionate to the vast damage he is doing in Oz. If he doesn’t reduce the speed at which he scores in the next test, we may well have to fit him up with some trumped up charges of sexual assault.†:twisted: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hazo Posted December 12, 2010 Report Share Posted December 12, 2010 Pommy bastards. We'll still win. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted December 16, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 16, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted December 16, 2010 Report Share Posted December 16, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted December 16, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 16, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! I agree with you there mate!!! Hope we can take a few wickets with the new ball!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted December 16, 2010 Report Share Posted December 16, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! I agree with you there mate!!! Hope we can take a few wickets with the new ball!!!! England looking good to take a 2-0 Ashes retaining lead.......there you go Dave I've just jinxed them, see the wickets fall now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LakeGeneve Posted December 16, 2010 Report Share Posted December 16, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! I agree with you there mate!!! Hope we can take a few wickets with the new ball!!!! England looking good to take a 2-0 Ashes retaining lead.......there you go Dave I've just jinxed them, see the wickets fall now It is going to be a long, long summer if the Aussies keep playing like the english! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted December 17, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! I agree with you there mate!!! Hope we can take a few wickets with the new ball!!!! England looking good to take a 2-0 Ashes retaining lead.......there you go Dave I've just jinxed them, see the wickets fall now 5 for 119 at lunch thanks Stevie I am watching them fall now!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LakeGeneve Posted December 17, 2010 Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 Aust 9/267 geez the english are starting to struggle!!!!!!! 268 all out mate .... i reckon u got them Poms well rattled now !! mind u at 1 stage i thought u would be lucky to get 150 !!! I agree with you there mate!!! Hope we can take a few wickets with the new ball!!!! England looking good to take a 2-0 Ashes retaining lead.......there you go Dave I've just jinxed them, see the wickets fall now 5 for 119 at lunch thanks Stevie I am watching them fall now!!!!! Good to see the english playing yet again, like um well England. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lizardo Posted December 17, 2010 Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 I knew Dave would reappear......187 all out from a position of 78 without loss....form is temporary but England's ability to collapse in a pathetic heap is permanent! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted December 17, 2010 Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 I knew Dave would reappear......187 all out from a position of 78 without loss....form is temporary but England's ability to collapse in a pathetic heap is permanent! never underestimate an english cricket teams ability to ****** defeat from the jaws of victory !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave40 Posted December 17, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 I knew Dave would reappear......187 all out from a position of 78 without loss....form is temporary but England's ability to collapse in a pathetic heap is permanent! Don't forget you guys are 1 up but we are coming back!!!!! A close match is a good match!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiaranM Posted December 17, 2010 Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 I knew Dave would reappear......187 all out from a position of 78 without loss....form is temporary but England's ability to collapse in a pathetic heap is permanent! Don't forget you guys are 1 up but we are coming back!!!!! A close match is a good match!!!!!! 47/2 .... ponting gone for 1 .... he's having a nightmare of a series so far !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevieJR Posted December 17, 2010 Report Share Posted December 17, 2010 I knew Dave would reappear......187 all out from a position of 78 without loss....form is temporary but England's ability to collapse in a pathetic heap is permanent! Don't forget you guys are 1 up but we are coming back!!!!! A close match is a good match!!!!!! 47/2 .... ponting gone for 1 .... he's having a nightmare of a series so far !! 63/3 in the 2nd innings and its only the 2nd day....who says test matches are boring! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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