English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 1 If you stay in a motel off the interstate, you WILL be murdered. 2 In the future everyone is a leather wearing punk. (Unless it's the 70's future, in which case everyone wears silver.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DANNO Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 3 Shoot James Bond the first chance you have...never wait, or talk or delay...or he will escape, most likely over your dead body! 4 The good guys always wear white hats Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeeMarc Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 5. Women invariably fall down and twist their ankle at the worst possible time when being chased by someone/something horrible or threatening. 6. All guns have way more bullets than you think. 7. When on foot, and being chased by a car, always keep running along the road where its easy for the car to run you down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 8. If you're just finishing high school, never ever have a party in the abandoned lakeside camp. Various gruesome deaths await. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crustyjuggler Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 9. Sooner or later eddie murphy will win an oscar for donkey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 10. If you are a plumber in a 70's porn film then you are about to have a threesome with lesbian Swedish twins... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crustyjuggler Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 11. even at a snails pace, that zombie will chase you down and eat your brain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 12. Virgins don't get killed in slasher movies. 13. When your gun runs out of bullets, you should throw it away in the street. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 14. The bad guys are always **** at shooting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 15. Bad guys don't need to run fast, they can walk ahead of anyone, no matter how fast they are running. 16. If you walk backwards there will always be a dry twig to stand on, or a bad guy waiting for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eagle Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crustyjuggler Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 18. water wells are bad news.. period... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 19. If you are a policeman, never tell anyone you will retire in 1 weeks' time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 ... 17(!) When being strangled from above, there is always a poker within arm's reach - luckily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
English_Bob Posted December 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 20. When an old man tells you to stay on the path or not to go into the cemetery, stay on the ******* path and keep out of the ******* cemetery! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eagle Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 ... 17(!) When being strangled from above, there is always a poker within arm's reach - luckily. I was gonna say every 6 shooter has up to 15 shots with out reloading but PeeMarc got it with #6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crustyjuggler Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 21. Nobody will ever pour a full cup of tea Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eagle Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 22:must have a nude shower scene for no apparent reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaunitz Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 23: When fleeing the bad guys, women and small-scale actors always run upstairs just to find themselves on a solitary roof top 24: Telephone numbers always start with 555 25: No matter how wet the scenery gets, main actor's/actress' hair is always perfectly styled - latest five seconds after they get out of the water 26: Women ALWAYS do the opposite of what they are told to do, thus provoking either their own death or a serious problem for the main actor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 26: Women ALWAYS do the opposite of what they are told to do... em, that's real life too!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crustyjuggler Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 27. Always let the Wookie win Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaunitz Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 26: Women ALWAYS do the opposite of what they are told to do... em, that's real life too!! Yep, but in the movies this habit gives us ten more minutes of suspension! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stramash Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 26: Women ALWAYS do the opposite of what they are told to do... em, that's real life too!! Yep, but in the movies this habit gives us ten more minutes of suspension! and in real life about 30-40 years of it!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaunitz Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 26: Women ALWAYS do the opposite of what they are told to do... em, that's real life too!! Yep, but in the movies this habit gives us ten more minutes of suspension! and in real life about 30-40 years of it!! Well, THIS I would rather call pain in the a** or adrenaline overdose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJTX Posted December 23, 2009 Report Share Posted December 23, 2009 28. If it's a really good movie some idiot in the cinema will always be talking on hs mobile :evil: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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