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101 Movie truths


English_Bob
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80. Aforementioned computer nerds can hack into NASA with a mobile and Rolf Harris's stylophone.

81. Girls can knock out guys.... but only if the girls are wearing leather or spandex jump suits.... (it doesn't matter what the guys are wearing).

82. In martial arts movies, old men can knock out young men with two fingers... that's the old men who use two fingers... not the knocked out guys who have two fingers instead of the usual number.

83. In New York, even waitresses live in three bedroom luxury apartments with a view of Central Park.

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78. Extras in crap Tom Berenger films are often played by Mancunians with (allegedly) big knobs.

:twisted:

Hardly 'often'!

surprisingly often according to imdb :wink:

Ohhh! Is my knob listed in the end credits?

They also used it as a stunt double for the submarine in 'The Hunt for Red October'.

84. Sean Connery needs an Oscar for his countless portrayals of a Scotsman.

85. Nobody leaves the Mafia alive.

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31 When she says: "I'm not that kind of girl" :oops:

She real is that kind of girl by the end of the scene/ movie...

32. When she says "I'm not that kind of girl" in a hardcore porn movie; you know by the end of scene 4 she will have done lesbian, anal, facials and possibly the neighbour's Alsatian.

:twisted:

Do they really have a dialogue? :roll:

''''''''''''''

87. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

88. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

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91. When being chased, someone can jump or fall great heights, land on a thin canvas awning, or fall through the glass roof of a restaurant, and land back first on a table where everyone is dining, get up unscathed, run across the road, get hit by a car, and still continue running away.

The hero who is normally chasing them manages to take the lift, and still catches them.

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93. (The Director's Cut) :D See 104.

Computers and the internet are unbelievably fast. One can switch on, connect to the internet, and access anything in under ten seconds.

All government websites and highly secure computer systems are just so easy to access, because everyone can crack their encryption systems in minutes with that "special program".

100,000,000 dollars wired to your offshore account? Just give me your six digit number, and I will do it right away from my laptop.

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92. English is not only the international language.... it is universal. Wherever your space ship lands, aliens can communicate in English. And they almost always have two arms, legs, eyes and a mouth.

92. Computers and the internet are unbelievably fast. One can switch on, connect to the internet, and access anything in under ten seconds.

103. There are always plot holes and bloopers.... you just have to look out for them and then pretend it was part of your original plan.

104. You can always go back and edit it... then call it 'The Director's Cut'...

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106. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

107. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

108. Every computer expert is either black, a teenager, or in a wheelchair.

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