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Pick Up Lines


appun
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Think you've heard the worst or funniest pick up line ever? .... So hit lately :lol::lol: .... I have some :!:

- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together... :shock:

- Is your dad a thief or something? Because someone stole the stars and put them into your eyes! :twisted:

- Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?? :lol:

- I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart...YUKKK :shock:

- Can I have directions to your heart?

- I've heard sex is a killer, wanna die happy? ??? Kewl 8)

Is that the get laid lines???

...So funny....Okay now What's yours??.... :arrow:

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i once heard a really drunk friend tell a bar maid....

"i may only have a 2 inch penis, but i've got alot of weight behind it wink! wink!"

or

"have you ever had your boobs weighed??" "no, how do you weigh your boobs??" "like this" (he then put his hands on her boobs and juggles them around shouting whey hey)

don't worry girls, he got a slap!!!

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i once heard a really drunk friend tell a bar maid....

"i may only have a 2 inch penis, but i've got alot of weight behind it wink! wink!"

or

"have you ever had your boobs weighed??" "no, how do you weigh your boobs??" "like this" (he then put his hands on her boobs and juggles them around shouting whey hey)

don't worry girls, he got a slap!!!

---- I lost my number, can I have yours? ---- :lol::lol:

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- Lets bypass all the bullshit and just get naked!

- Excuse me, do i f**ked u already?

. ..I doubt it would work lol

how about

Excuse me, do u f**ked me already?

LOL

Not yet lol

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Some of these are pretty perverted...

"I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle."

"You are so beautiful that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I'm 20."

"Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!"

"My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off you blouse in a public place."

"Should I call you in the morning or nudge you?"

"Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy."

"You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case."

"My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me any time you want to."

"Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus."

"I bet you're a C-cup. My testicles are the same size."

"My love for you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in."

"I just **** into my pants. Can I get into yours?"

"If you were my sister/brother, incest would be cool."

Sick, I know.

There are plenty of others like it. They can be found here.

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"Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street."

"That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed."

"That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too."

"If your right leg was Christmas and your left leg was Easter, would you let me spend some time up between the holidays?"

And finally, the most perverted one of all:

"I wanna floss with your pubic hair."

:shock:

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1. I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

2. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

3. Nice legs...what time do they open?

4. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

5. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

6. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

7. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

8. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

9. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.

10. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

11. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

12. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

13. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

14. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

15. Are those real?

16. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

20. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

22. F @# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga Titsbottom?

23. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

24. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

25. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

26. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute."

27. Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

28. I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?

29. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.

30. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?

31. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me

32. Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them.

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8. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

10. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

11. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

12. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

23. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

24. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

30. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?

ROFLMAO!!!! :lol:

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A Classic that always get a large smile on her face:

You know what looks good on you ?..... ME

A real killer:

If you are with a mate, once the first eye contact is made, cross the room, get to her and say, pointing back at your friend: "Excuse me, but my friends wants to know if you thing I AM CUTE"

And if nothing works or you got no time:

Can I buy you a drink or you just want the money ?

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